This evening we will start a Learn-in on Depression.
Someone will be posting topics shortly.
The Emowebby
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Emowebby |
Emoclear & Depression Learn-in. |
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Posts: 5890 (05/17/02 05:31 PM) |
Hello Folks:
This evening we will start a Learn-in on Depression. Someone will be posting topics shortly. The Emowebby |
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Unregistered(d) |
What is depression? | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/17/02 06:14 PM) |
Emoclearians:
***Warning: Persons with depression or having suicidial thoughts should seek a consultation with a therapist. Some forms of depression have biological roots.*** These are the opening topics- What is depression? What's the DSM definition? What are some of it's potential causes? Jump in! William Tekada |
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What is depression? | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/18/02 12:30 AM) |
Hello Emoclearians:
What's depression? Officially in the DSM IV there are several types of depression that fall under mood disorders. In general depression has these kinds of symptoms: Fatigue or low energy. Poor self-image. Appetite decreased or increased. Reduced concentration or indecisiveness. Feelings of hopelessness. Sleep increased or decreased. Apathy. Pessimism. Disinterest in food and relationships. Thoughts of suicide. (If you have these contact a therapist immediately) In earlier post Steve Mensing mentioned a practical criteria for depression: "You might have depression if you suffer from at least 5 of the following 9 cues for at least 2 weeks: (1) Apetite loss or gain or weight change. (2) Sleeping more than usual or less than usual. (3) Excessive tiredness. (4) Physically slowed down or agitated. (5) Loss of pleasure or interest in usual activities. (6) Feeling guilty. (7) Slow thinking or indecisiveness. (8) Thoughts of killing yourself (Call a therapist immediately with #8).(9)Strong negative view of self, others, and the world." People who've had depression for more than a few weeks or who really feel hopeless should make an appointment with a therapist before this situation worsens. Jump on in. John Gastly John changed a numerical error. |
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What is depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/18/02 10:02 AM) |
Hi, Excessive guilt feelings may sometimes be involved in depression from my personal experience. Thinking of death and not necessarily suicide can be involved. Maybe even getting away from everything. Feeling worthless and like a failure. You might wake up lots or wake up earlier in the morning. You don't look forward to nothing. The blues seems like a step up. Like you were born neath a bad sign.
JoJet99 |
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Unregistered(d) |
What is depression? | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/18/02 03:47 PM) |
Hey Emoclearians:
I want to stress as well that is someone feels way down there or is even giving the slightest consideration to suicide they should make contact with a therapist immediately and not attempt to go it alone. Also another important warning is that drinking, relaxation exercises, sleeping medications, or anything that causes your body to go into a down mode will heighten feelings of depression. In recognizing depression the depressed person will pessimistic and have little faith that life will give them what they want. Depressed persons see themselves as lacking in what is required for a happy and satisfying life. Someone suffering from this negative outlook will be sensitive to failure and rejection. They will expect them and will be watching for evidence of future loss. Often with depressed persons they will be carrying on an inner chant with much self-downing. There surrounds become unappealing. The food loses its flavor. Life seems like going through the motions. Losses seem more extreme. There will often be a knocking of yourself for not living up to certain rules. The words worthless and failure may be a large part of the subvocal chant. Teko |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/18/02 09:11 PM) |
Greetings all,
With depression there is a magnification of the negative and a minimization of the positive. This is the depressive trance. This lethargic and tired outlook may include excessive pity about the self and other persons. Depressed persons may be tuned into other person's difficulities. Sometimes to the point of thinking that other persons are feeling down as well. Memory will reflect mostly negative memories because this is the nature of depressive selection. With depression there is an inner demandingness on the self and mostly the self does not measure up. Perfectionism is often one of the roots of depression. Depression is a few flights down from disappointment and sadness. In depression persons are less likely to take important action because of fatigue and a why even bother attitude. This why action is often important in combating depression. Fred Tellford |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/19/02 12:20 AM) |
Hello,
Depression is often more intense during certain times of the day. Often in the mornings and in the evenings. Depression is often set off by how someone views a loss. People who experience depression often see their losses as something likely to continue. Often depressed people feel extremely powerless over their situation. Life seems meaningless and unstimulating. Persons deeply depressed seek to cut themselves off from others. They can feel like a burden. Simple chores are forgotten. Failures are seen much bigger than they are. Many depression sufferers have trouble asserting themselves and asking for what they want. Jayne Burgos |
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Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/19/02 05:04 AM) |
Hello,
Depression can have psychosomatic effects. These may appear as physical symtoms. Depression can have an effect on the response of the immune system and the body's ability to fight off illnesses. Depression can lead to loss of appetite, or even to compulsive overeating as a way of avoiding feelings, either of which will put stress on the physical body. laying around all day and eating junk foods, or laying around all day and not eating at all will contribute to the downward spiral. Taking direct action, exercising, jogging, pumping fresh air through the body by some vigorous activity, almost anything to get the system moving again can be very helpful. Eating a balanced and healthy diet is helpful. Lacking certain types of vitamins or nutrients can also contribute to depression. Comedy is helpful, slapstick, whatever makes the person laugh and lighten up is also helpful. Depression is often accompanied by a loss of the sense of humor, and the loss of ability to appreciate the events of ordinary life, and restoring these abilities will be very helpful. Depressed people are often way out of touch with their feelings, they feel numb or dead, or the world seems colored over by a drab filter. Learning to reconnect with feelings can be very helpful. Depression can have an effect on the body's harmonal production, and on the lymphatic system. A cycle begins where the person feels down emotionally, and this produces a depressed physical response, which contributes to their down emotional state, and so on. If the person caves in to this cycle and just lays around the house all day, things can get really bad. Depression can be attacked on multiple levels - physical, psychological, and emotional. Taking a comprehensive approach and working on all levels is the best. Getting the physical body active again is often a good first step, as this will open the door to get endorphins flowing again and restore the emotional well being. Right diet will further prevent the system from clogging up again, and also aid in the functioning of the lympahtic and immune systems. Cheers, Yogi |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/19/02 08:39 AM) |
Hello Emoclearians,
Depression often leads to inactivity. Without activity a great limit is placed on someone's ability to have pleasure. Also without activity someone loses a sense of control over their life. They are effected by life more than they are effecting live. This all increases the caving in effect. In depression there is a sense of stuckness. Magnified stuckness. Persons dwell on the same internal "videos". Resisting them. There is a loss of involvement with others. Depressed people often keep to themselves and are caught up in the inner negative chatterbox (ruminative chant) of self-downing and hopelessness. In depression people begin to feel as if their state of depression is forever and the only reality available. Julian Kammerz |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/19/02 11:54 PM) |
Hello Emoclears:
When someone is depressed they often forget about previous success and the highwater marks in their life. They often easily recall mistakes and failures. Depression, even though it might come and go during the day like when someone talks to a friend, the depressed person will likely recall the entire day as being depressing. The depressed person will frequently attack themselves. They will even attack themselves for being depressed. What creates depression? Certainly how persons interpret loss and rejection has to be one of the major reasons. Numerous thought distortions appear linked to depressive thinking which inturn stimulates a depressive perspective. Among these styles of thinking are all or nothing thinking, self-labeling, minimization and maximization, shoulding/musting, awfulizing, can't stand-it itis, impossibilizing, and absolutizing. Peter Warren |
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Unregistered(d) |
What causes depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/20/02 08:28 AM) |
Hello Emoclearians:
There are certain areas of the brain such as the amygdala and thalamus, that if not operating properly can contribute to depression as can disruptions of the neurotransmitters norepinephrine and serotonin. These chemicals conduct electrical currents in the nervous system. Too little of these neurostransmitters and you become lethargic and apathetic. These are what some anti-depressant medications try to address, yet more recently it's been found that aerobic exercise, proper nutrition, and bright light also increase neurotransmitters without the sideeffects of medication. Mostly depresson is fired off by a person's take on events. Such events might be a loss of job, a divorce, ongoing health problems. For depression to occur the person would have to believe the event that occurred would have to be very negative. This is where thought distortions might eneter into the process. Here someone might beleve what happened was: Disasterous rather than incovenient. Something that should not have have happened. Can't be stood rather than could stand. I'm worthless or a failure instead of I'm a fallible human. The above types of thinking may contribute to the feelings of depression. Here's one way of seeing depression: a) You have a loss. b) You think in strongly negative ways about the event. c) Areas of the brain become involved in creating the depressing emotional response. d) Certain bodily chemistry becomes depleted. e) Depression sets in. f) You act in lethargic ways. g) This compounds the feelings of depression. e) Your memory becomes selective tending to look only at depressive events. f) This adds further to the depression. In depression there is a complex chain of occurences that takes place in order for depression to occur. Nina Kanis |
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Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/20/02 09:32 AM) |
Hi all,
Sometimes during the winter months people become depressed because of a lack of sunlight in the morning. Without the proper amount of light people overproduce meloton which tends to put the body into a hybernation response. This lethargy can create a depression effect. Randi Washburn Hi all, Time to update the Depression Learn-in. Ed Boylan Dave Cohen Unregistered User (3/2/06 2:32 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, The Positive Psychology Exercises Learn-in. Good exercises for depression. p203.ezboard.com/femoclea...=118.topic Dave Cohen Eric Unregistered User (3/3/06 12:15 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost- Gil asks: "What do you see as being the finest anti-depressant methods?" **Warning: Persons suffering with depression should consult with a therapist knowledgeable in the area of depression. Some depressions may be triggered by hormonal inbalances, allergies, and the like. These would have to be addressed before someone would make real progress. Some forms of depression like bipolar manic depression need to be monitored with the supervision of a mental health professional. Anyone with suicidal thoughts should seek professional help immediately." Gil at this point in time I'd pick approaches that crowded out distorted negative thinking, rumination, and inaction. These approaches are very useful for depression. *Learning to spot and change distorted thoughts. This approach is seen in Cognitive Therapy and REBT. At Emoclear we provide: "Tips on spotting and changing distorted thoughts". This is a comprehensive list of various thought distortions and questions to challenge them. Also learn to spot and process "Personality Clusters" which pertain to depression. *Breaking rumination and overdreaming. Rumination, prior to bedtime, can trigger overdreaming which can disturb sound sleep and lead to "early morning waking". Early morning waking inturn leads to exhaustion in the morning and more rumination (A inward hypnotic like subvocal negative chant filled with self-downing and negative distortions). At Emoclear we provide the Rumination Breaker a method for halting rumination prior to going to sleep. The method has us write down our ruminative thoughts, spot distortions in them and challenge them. This is followed by recalling 10 to 12 positive memories. *Positive Psychology methods. These methods get folks out of inaction and into doing important, meaningful, and pleasurable activities and to gratefully recollect the actions of others. At Emoclear we recently posted positive psychology exercises. *Exercise. Walking, running, and other aerobic exercises have been shown to elevate moods and block rumination. Taking part in an exercise program also gives someone a sense of control over their lives. At Emoclear we provide the Limbic Mood Elevator and Integration Walking for exercise that lifts our moods. *Becoming mindfully aware of our thoughts and emotions. Learning to acknowledge, feel, accept, and integrate/ desensitize our thoughts and feelings reduces stress and rumination. At Emoclear we offer mindful emotional processes like the E-Integrator and the Cardio Integrator as well as the Emotional Writing Process. *Learning to take action even when you don't feel like it gives someone a sense of control over their lives, gets important, meaningful, and pleasurable things done. No matter how we initially feel we can still get up and do something even if we don't feel like it or are inspired. See the Emoclear "A Call to Action" and "The Action Manuever". *Eating more protein and less carbs in the morning can help elevate moods and lead to clearer thinking for hours. Research books on the food-mood connection. *Consider light boxes or Vitamin D supplements if you are diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder. Take care, Steve Jarrod Unregistered User (3/4/06 1:43 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposted by Jarrod. Dave asks: "What is the effect of p11 protein on depression? It's said some people who have chronic depression have lower p11 protein?" Dave, according to research being conducted at Rockefeller University and the Karolinska Institute (Sweden) and reported in "Science", the protein p11 seems to regulate our brain cells response to serotonin. P11's modulation role appears to be a major player in the devlopment of depression and may eventually prove useful in its treatment. The majority of antidepressant medications are aimed at making the neurotransmitter serotonin more available to our brain cells. Depressed folks are said not to have enough of this neurotransmitter and get depressed as a result. Apparently serotonin depends on how well it binds to receptors' on cell surfaces. Current research zeroes in the receptor "1B" which appear to play a major role in depression. Apparently the protein p11 increases the numbers of serotonin receptors on the brain cell surfaces. This helps serotonin to do its tasks. Several experiments were performed which utilized specially bred "depressed" mice and brain tissues removed during autopsies of depressed persons. Depressed folks were found to have very low levels of p11 than non-depressed individuals. So did the depressed mice. During these studies on p11 two antidepressants (A tricyclic and a MAO inhibiter) and electric shock therapy were administered to the "depressed" mice. With each treatment the p11 increased in the mice brains. Later researchers bred mice no p11-producing gene. They showed less serotonin activity and had less 1B receptor sites. They demonstrated little improvement with their depression. Other mice were bred to produce extra p11. They showed no depression and their brains had extra serotonin signaling receptors. These findings may lead the way to understanding depression in a biological framework and may lead to new and more helpful medication treatments for depression. Keep in mind that many nonbiological interventions exist for depression and that p11 may be increased by reducing stress. Nonbiological approaches may include positive psychology, rumination breaking, cognitive style therapies, doing important, meaningful, and pleasurable activities, having close friends, emotional processing, exercise, and good relationships. More studies are required on the challenges of p11. It's known that certain stress hormones may effect p11 availability. So stress reduction may prove a good idea in an overall plan to overcome depression. **If someone believes they are depressed they should visit a therapist who is knowledgeable in brief therapies for this difficulty. Depression may have many contributing factors some of which may be physiological like hormones and allergies. Very often depression has it's start in how we think and act.** Take care, Steve Dan Canepa Unregistered User (3/6/06 4:27 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, Let's begin a thread on getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. Alyce Waters THE RUMINATION BREAKER (Updated) Rumination, the trance like repetitive negative thinking that depressed individuals suffer and a major contributer to depression, is especially problematic when it happens prior to sleeping at night. When rumination occurs prior to bedtime, it often causes "overdreaming". Here the dreamer dreams much more than usual and robs himself or herself of sound and restful sleep. Dreams are valuable for integrating ruminations, worry, and unintegrated emotional material. When we dream we don't sleep soundly. Unsound sleep leads to waking in the middle of the night or too early in the morning. This compounds depression and makes for increased tiredness and lethargy. This in turn will create more ruminations which will increase depression. Ruminations contain a wealth of distorted thoughts like negative self-labeling, all-or-nothing-thinking, shoulding, horribilizing, and can't stand it-itis. The Rumination Breaker, in breaking down and integrating ruminative trances, combines: *An emotional writing exercise which integrates the ruminative emotions and distorted thinking. *A method for recognizing and desensitizing specific thought distortions common to rumination. *A replacement pattern of positive memories to start a climb back to a good mood. (c) Steve Mensing ***Warning: This process is not to be used by anyone with a history of mental illness, severe trauma, or panic. These challenges are best handled with a therapist. You are only permitted to use this process if you agree to absolve Steve Mensing, the webmasters, Emoclear.com and the web host of any responsibility for the application or misapplication of this process. With any emotional process the possibility of discomfort exists.*** THE RUMINATION BREAKER The steps to the Rumination Breaker: (1) Write out your ruminations in a spiral bound notebook or write them out on your computer. Write them free form without any attempt to censor them. Let them come bubbling out. Describe completely how you feel and think. Let yourself feel what you're writing. Leave no stone unturned. (2) In your brief emotional writing process pay close attention to any thought distortions you find in your emotional writing. Learn to recognize these common distortions. Either question the beliefs or write the beliefs out over and over while you're in a relaxed and neutral state. This activity, like the Belief Repeater Process, will desensitize the emotional charge on these distorted belief and help break the rumination cycle. If you want to use the Belief Repeater Process, instead of writing the distortions out, it will be posted after the list of thought distortions. A list of the most common ruminative distortions will be posted below. (3) Finish by recalling 10 to 12 very pleasant memories from your past. These may come from your school days, friends, family, work, favorite hobbies, or any other area of your life. Just recall these good times from start to finish. This will conclude the last step of the process. CHECK LIST FOR COMMON RUMINATIVE DISTORTIONS Language and its meaning is highly important in creating our emotional reactions and sensations. Cues that we are employing distorted and upsetting thoughts can be found in difficulty creating evaluations. Automatic & habitual, difficulty creating evaluations occur without reason or reflection. Here is a checklist of words and phrases we use in absolutistic and upsetting evaluations: AWFULIZING: Here we make inconveniences or discomfort into disasters, catastrophes, something awful, horrible, or terrible. When awfulizing we fail to notice the positive or the neutral in our experience. Awful, horrible, and terrible generally imply 100% negative experiences. Very few experiences are fully awful. Believing a situation is awful will make it feel that way. Most so-called awful experiences could be made much worse. If you awfulize you could see your experience as "inconvenient", a "hassle", or "uncomfortable". "Difficult" & "tough" also work better. Typical awfulizing words: awful, horrible, terrible, disaster, holocaust, the worst, doom, total hell, catastrophe, the pits. To test your situation to see if it is really awful--ask the following questions: *Does feeling awful actually prove the situation is awful? *Does your belief create your feelings of awfulness or horribleness? *If you believed the event was inconvenient, would you feel differently? *Is there anything positive or neutral in your situation? A valuable learning experience? *How long will your situation last? Can you cope with it? *How is a disadvantage or inconvenience awful? *Could this situation be made much worse? *How does your difficulty compare with: (1) Being roasted slowly? (2) Dieing gradually and agonizingly from a rare disease? (3) Seeing loved ones paraded into slavery? (4) Being tortured slowly by aliens from another galaxy? *Is your situation truly awful or is it an inconvenience? CAN'T STAND IT-ITIS: Here we use evaluations like: "I can't stand it." "It's too much." "I can't take it." "It's driving me out of my mind." "It's overwhelming me." "When will this ever stop?" With these phrases we make uncomfortable and frustrating circumstances into unbearable ones. "Can't stand it-itis" resides at the core of impatience and frustration intolerance. If you're doing something that better be done and you feel extremely frustrated, you might think: "I can stand it." "It's not too much." "I can take it." "I can hang in there." "I've stood it before." "Much of life is challenging--I can put up with it." Typical can't stand it-itis phrases are: "I can't stand it." "I can't take it. " "This's driving me crazy." "I'm being overwhelmed." "When will this ever end?" "This's killing me." "I'm going out of control." "Life should be easy." See if you can really stand your situation by answering these questions: *Could you stand it? Have you stood it before? *Have you coped with a similar situation? *Could you stand it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *If your brain is healthy--can you really go crazy or would you just get upset? *Have you ever lived without it? *Where's the evidence that it's too much? *Can you stand it for a minute at a time? SHOULDING: Here we elevate desires and preferences into arbitrary and ironclad laws such as shoulds, musts, oughts, got to's, and deserves. Shoulding offers us little choice, creates pressures, and leads to anger, guilt, and shame. With shoulds we create new rules and play Jehovah with ourselves and others. If we are shoulding, we better use: "want", "prefer", "desire", "would strongly like", or "better do". Understand that everything is always as it SHOULD be. You may not enjoy the present, yet you better accept the idea that everything required to create current reality was done. The present SHOULD have occurred as it is now. It is unrealistic and playing GOD to believe that reality SHOULD not have happened the way it happened. Reality is as it exists. Every prerequisite was met. To demand "it" SHOULD not have taken place will upset you and buy you 2 problems for the price of 1. And by demanding "it" SHOULD not have occurred, you fail to accept what happened. If we don't like the present, we may alter it if possible and prevent what occurred from happening in the future. Reasonable "shoulds" refer to current reality and can be observed clearly by others. Unreasonable "shoulds" are based on the idea that things SHOULD occur because we demand they do. Not based on present observations, unreasonable shoulds are often grounded in the notion that what is correct for us is right for everyone. Example: Mensing's truths should work for everybody. Typical should phrases: "I should." "They must." "The world ought." "I've got to." "They have to." "They deserve." To test your "should" laws & rules--ask the following questions: *What law in the universe says you must or they should? *What evidence is there that you or they must or should? *Who or what creates this commandment? *Would a want or a preference give you or them more of a choice? *How would you talk a friend out of this must or should? *Where is it written that what you want, you must get? LABELING: Here we overgeneralize with the "verb to be" about ourselves, others, things, events, & the world. Example: "I'm no good." "I'm worthless." "I'm a failure." "They are slobs." "New York is a totally sick place." "Everything is no good." By overgeneralizing with "labeling" we, they, or it becomes one behavior, trait or quality. Example: I failed a geometry test--I'm a failure. Or they behaved badly--they are bad. Sometimes we might label the world, things, and events with an overgeneralized tag. Example: Philadelphia is a snake pit. Or my job is the pits. Obviously Philadelphia and jobs contain far more than negative qualities. If we label, it is better to choose labels that carry the notion that we and everything in this world are multi-faceted and contain many, many positive, neutral, and negative qualities. Recommended labels for the self: "I'm a multi-faceted person." "I'm a person with many positive, neutral, and some negative qualities." "I'm human with a wide range of qualities." These labels apply to others as well. Recommended labels for things, events, and the world: "It is multi-faceted." "It has many positive, neutral, and negative qualities." If you are labeling, ask yourself the following questions: *Do you have millions of traits & behaviors? *How can you just be one or a few traits & behaviors? *Can you choose not to rate yourself by a gross overgeneralization? *Is viewing yourself as just one or a few traits an overgeneralization? *List some of your many positive & neutral traits & behaviors. *Is it arbitrary to assign points to a trait or a behavior? How many points do you get added or subtracted for fallen arches? NEEDING NONNECESSITIES: Here we employ words like need, must have, got to have, require, and can't do without. Our desires and wants become elevated into needs and dire neccessities (water, food, oxygen etc.) for living and for happiness. Feelings of desperation and craving are set off by needing nonnecessities. Overcome this challenge by knowing you desire or want what you don't truly need. Better use words like: "want", "desire", "prefer", & "would strongly like." If you have been needing nonneccessities, ask yourself the following questions: *Would you die if you did not have it? *Is this truly necessary for survival or enjoyment? *Is this an important as food, oxygen, & protection from the elements? *Could you find pleasure doing something else or being with someone else? *Does your feelings of desperation or craving actually prove you need something or do they reflect your belief that you "need" something? *Is this something you need or something you want? *Can you accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving & caring manner? ABSOLUTIZING: With this challenge we employ words like always, never, all the time, forever, totally, continually, not ever, eternally, unceasingly, absolute, incessant, completely, entire, whole, and unrelenting. Absolutizing words mean 100% of the time with no exceptions. Often these words are linked to anger, depression, and impatience. Example: Victor is "never" on time. Or Sally "always" gets it wrong. If we are absolutizing we better use more accurate words like: "frequently", "infrequently", "sometimes", "often", "a good deal of the time", "every once in awhile", "intermittently", and "partially". These words lead to less upsetting emotional responses. If you are absolutizing, ask yourself the following questions: *Does this happen sometimes, frequently, or even infrequently? *What percentage of the time does this occur? *Is it really the entire situation or just a part or a percentage of it? *You mean always, in every single instance? *Does it ever stop? Has it ever stopped before? IMPOSSIBLE-IZING: Here we make difficult tasks into impossible tasks by using words like too difficult, too hard, impossible, unbelievably hard, too much, can't, and not a chance. Ask yourself if you could complete the task with the help of a support team, machines, or computers. Perhaps the task could be completed if you had new information. Further, could you complete the task if you just stuck with it or knew you would receive 2 million dollars or some other valuable reward? How would the task look to you if you broke it down into small manageable units rather that an overwhelming whole? Is it really impossible if you did it step by step? Remove "too" from difficult, hard, and much. Replace "can't" with can and will do. If you are impossible-izing, we better use words such as: "can", "possible", "possible with help", "difficult", "hard", "manageable", and "stong possibility". If you are impossible-izing, ask yourself the following questions: *Can you view the task in small manageable units and do it step by step? *Could you do it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *Could you complete the task if your life depended on it? *Could you do the task if you had more information, a brain trust, computer support, large machinery, a team, or some other form of assistance? *Is it really impossible? *If you previously made mistakes, does it hold that you will always make the same mistake? *Was a previous failure just an unwanted result or learning experience on the way to your goal? OVERGENERALIZING: Here several instances of a category are seen as an entire category. Overgeneralizing comes in two basic flavors. (1) An event happens and we conclude it will occur again & again. Example: I got fired, I'll always be fired. (2) You evaluate yourself, another person, or the world by one or a few traits. Example: I got rejected, I'm a reject. If you overgeneralize, focus on: (1) Frequency of occurence. This will give you a more realistic view. (2) That you recognize everything and every person possesses positive, neutral, and negative qualities. Here's some questions you can ask: *Are you or they just one trait or several, or many like most people? *Just because it happened once before, does it follow that it will ALWAYS happen? *How often does this happen? VIEWING ONLY THE NEGATIVE: This mindset has us seeing only the negative while filtering out the positive. Example: My wife did 7 really helpful things for me today, yet I only recall her failure to take a message when someone called. If you sometimes view only the negative, practice looking at what good or neutral things are happening in your life. You may want to make daily lists for several weeks to remind yourself of what is positive and neutral. Here's some questions you can ask yourself: *Did positive or neutral things happen? *If someone else was watching this situation, what positive or neutral things might they notice? BLACK & WHITE THINKING: Events are seen in black & white only with no neutral shades of gray. Or we see either/or situations, all or nothing, or one way or the other. These kinds of thinking signal we are not recognizing middle grounds, gray zones, average, or neutral areas. Most events don't occur in black or white or all-or-nothing terms without middle grounds. A black & white thinking example: If he's not a good guy, then he's a crook. Or if my performance wasn't great, then it stunk. If your thinking sometimes goes to blacks & whites, look at average, middle grounds, neutral, and gray areas. Here's some questions you can ask yourself: *Is there something average going on here? *Do you notice a middle ground? *How about a gray area? FAULT FINDING: Here we hunt for someone or something to blame. Example: If I didn't send Bobo to art school I'd be a millionaire. In fault finding we generally believe in one cause and one effect. Actually if we look at a situation from different perspectives we can find multiple causes and multiple effects. Fault finding is a serious waste of time that hampers finding solutions. Often when fault finding is applied to a person, we label that person and defocus from the behaviors that require change. The human brain is a wonderful device. It can come up with tons of causes, effects, and reasons after the fact. Fault finding, when applied to people, creates anger and guilt. It wastes energy better spent on solutions and changes in behavior. If you sometimes find fault, blame the entire universe for 2 seconds, then focus on what requires change. Here's questions we can ask ourselves: *What were some of the other possible causes? *Would someone else see someone or something else to blame? *Is there a solution to find, rather then spend time blaming? NIXING THE POSITIVE: Here we explain away positive events. Example: I would not have passed the test unless I got lucky. Or winning the Nobel Prize was nothing much--I had terrific lab equipment. If you tend to nix the positive, practice accepting what good comes your way. Note how your efforts were involved in the positive outcome. Here's questions to ask yourself: *What was your responsibility for this good thing happening? *Can you begin to notice the good things you did? GUT THINKING: Here you base your evidence on your surface feelings. Feelings can be as distorted as the beliefs, images, and thoughts creating them. Feelings are not facts nor are they deeper intuitions. Your feelings mirror your attitudes and if your attitudes are distorted, you can guarantee your evidence will also be distorted. Example: I feel in my bones this isn't going to be my year. Or I feel like I'm going to get assassinated if I go to next week's Shriner's meeting. Examples of gut thinking: *I feel stupid. *It feels like nothing will ever change. If you tend to gut think, check out the beliefs & images behind your feelings. Look at the evidence. Here's some questions to ask yourself: *Because something feels true or real, does that make it true or real? *Where's the evidence that because something feels real, that it is real? EXPANDING: Here we exaggerate small weaknessness or defects. Example: Making an error on the spelling bee was a disaster! Or my left nostril is slightly larger than the other--it destroys my face. If we expand, let us look at these deficiencies in the light of the larger context and accept what we can't change. Let us take into consideration what works and what is positive. Here's questions to ask yourself: *Is this an exaggeration? *Am I making this larger than it actually is? *How might others view this? CONTRACTING: Here we minimize assets or diminish the positive. Example: Winning the Super Bowl 3 years straight was nothing much. Or sure she's brainy, but she never uses it. If we contract the positive, let us accept what is positive and enjoy it. *Am I minimizing what I do? *How might others view this? PERFECTIONISM: We believe we can be perfect and live up to a superhuman standard. This thinking does not account for our innate tendency to make errors. Example: I should perform flawlessly and never make mistakes. If you tend toward perfectionism, recognize you are a fallible human who can only do his or her human best. You do not need to be perfect to accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving and caring manner. Here's some questions to ask yourself? *What law in the universe says you must be perfect or perform perfectly? *Are not mistakes valuable learning experiences? *Can you learn from your mistake and do it over? PERMANENT CONDITIONS: Taking a temporary or time limited situation and transforming it into a permanent condition. Examples: *I lost my job--I'll never work again. *She shot my proposal down--I'll never be married. Questions to ask yourself: *Isn't this a time-limited situation? *Is this a failure or is it feedback about my progress? *How permanant is this situation? *Could things change? PERSONALIZING: Taking personally random events and viewing them as attacks. Examples: *I must have been born under a bad sign because I fell down the subway steps. *If someone dies in a vehicular collision it's because of bad karma. Here's questions we can ask ourselves: *What evidence or ideas make you believe this? *Is there such a thing as dumb luck? *Is it possible your decisions and choices got you in this predicament? THE BELIEF REPEATER METHOD The Belief Repeater Method (BRM) is based on the observation that if you repeat distorted and self-defeating beliefs over and over while experiencing neutral emotional states, the belief loses it's emotional support and believability. (c) Steve Mensing ***WARNING: Folks with a history of mental illness, trauma, or panic are urged not to use this process without a counselor or therapist. If you decide to do this process you will agree to absolve the webmasters, their server, Emoclear.com, and Steve Mensing of any responsibility for the application or misapplication of this process. There is always in any emotional process the possibility that someone could experience some discomfort. So proceed with this warning.*** (1) CHOOSE A BELIEF YOU PREFER NOT TO BELIEVE: Choose a belief you find self-defeating or distorted and you prefer not to believe anymore. My belief is _______________________________________. (2) EXPERIENCE A NEUTRAL STATE (CALM, DETACHED, UNCONCERNED): Experience a neutral state or briefly consider something you do like eating oatmeal, reading the weather page of a newspaper, or reading Emoclear behavioral change instructions. Get into that calm neutral state and go to step (3). (3) REPEAT THE BELIEF, YOU PREFER TO DESENSITIZE, OVER AND OVER WHILE IN A NEUTRAL STATE: Repeat the belief, to be desensitized into unbelievability, over and over while in a neutral or calm state. If you feel yourself becoming aroused by the belief, then take a break. Go back and start again when your state returns to calm and neutral. Keep repeating the belief aloud until it has no emotional meaning. TIPS ON THE BELIEF REPEATER METHOD. (BRM) *Always hydrate yourself prior to using the BRM. *Utilize the Self-Defeating Beliefs Test to check your beliefs and the Tips on Thoughts Distortions to notice problematic thinking. *Test any beliefs you believe are self-defeating with this test: -Will this belief fit with my deepest values and yearnings? -Will this belief interfere with my personal relationships and family life? -Will this belief provide the emotions I prefer? -Will this belief support my short-term & long-term goals, my enlightened self-interest? -Will this belief give me something I don't want? -Will I be required to balance elements in my life owing to having this belief? -Does it improve my life or my ability to perform? -Does it keep me out of significant conflict with others? (unless the conflict is something I prefer). -Does it effect either my physical or mental health? -Could another belief work better for me? -Will this belief effect my behavior adversly? -Is the belief right for the context where it's employed? -Are there future consequences for holding this belief? -What might make it difficult to believe this in some instances? *Practice some kind a relaxation or calming maneuver prior to the Belief Repeater Method (BRM). This will be your neutral state to pair with the statments. *After you grow more experienced with the BRM you may add on a future-orientation-in-time questions to further desensitize the belief. You can add it after step (3). Ask this question: After my belief is meaningless and unbelievable, what will I see? What will I hear? What will I feel? What will I notice first when my belief becomes meaningless and unbelievable? What might I be doing differently? *Practice each segment of the BRM until you can flawlessly do the process from start to finish. *Utilize the VOC Scale to check the believability of your self-defeating or distorted belief: *Here's a scale to measure the believability of a belief: The VOC Scale (Validity of Cognition). The original VOC was 7 point scale which the EMDR people originated. I use a 10 point version of the scale. To utilize the scale properly do an intuitive read on the belief. THE VOC SCALE: 0-No belief in the belief at all. 1-Able to consider the belief's possibility. 2-Able to feel some hope the belief is true. 3-Able to relate to an experience that supports the possibility of believing the belief. 4-The belief has some grain of truth. 5-The belief begins to seem believable. 6-The belief has some partial truth. 7-The belief feels true, yet there are reservations. 8-The belief feels mostly true, but with some doubt. 9-The statement feels almost completely true. 10-The statement feels completely true--it is true beyond a doubt. The scale can be reduced to 1-10 and just choose a number. 1 meaning you don't believe it. 10 meaning you believe it. You get a felt sense read of the belief's validity and assign it a number. TIPS ON THE RUMINATION BREAKER *Make sure you're well hydrated. *Never practice the Rumination Breaker in bed or places where you like to feel comfortable. *Learn self-acceptance. See the Self-Acceptance Learn-in. *Eat well, practice good sleep habits, and exercise. All contribute to defeating rumination. *Walking, running, and other aerobic exercise can break up rumination. *When rumination occurs, step back from the thoughts through labeling them "Those thoughts", neutrally observe them, and let them be. They will often die down through this mindful exposure. *Learn to immediately redirect your attention to some other activity which provides importance, meaning, or pleasure. *Hangout with friends or call friends on the phone. *Do the "Left-Hemisphere Mood Elevator" found on the process page. This exercise consists of right nasal dominance breathing, looking to the extreme right while your head is turned left, and tightening the right side of your face. This exercise leads to mood elevation for one to three hours. *Placing ice cold water in your right ear will raise your mood and stifle rumination. Discontinue if you feel nauseous or off balance. Have fun, Steve Deana Unregistered User (10/12/05 5:19 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, Stopping rumination and starting to recall good things is one of the most valuable activities someone can do for depression. It stops rumination which makes for long REM cycles during sleep and hurts sleep. This leads to fatigue which heightens depression. Rumination produces a deep negative trance which strengthens depression and dark mindedness. The Rumination Breaker breaks the rumination trance in 3 ways. 1. The written exercise acts as exposure for rumination's emotions (Guilt, depression, shame, ect.) and to bring the trance thoughts to awareness. 2. It uses a check list of thought distortions to challenge and change distorted beliefs. This helps break the cycle of rumination. 3. Recalling positive memories starts thinking in another direction away from rumination and helps break the ruminative cycle. Deana THE RUMINATION BREAKER Rumination, the trance like repetitive negative thinking that depressed individuals suffer and a major contributer to depression, is especially problematic when it happens prior to sleeping at night. When rumination occurs prior to bedtime, it often causes "overdreaming". Here the dreamer dreams much more than usual and robs himself or herself of sound and restful sleep. Dreams are valuable for integrating ruminations, worry, and unintegrated emotional material. When we dream we don't sleep soundly. Unsound sleep leads to waking in the middle of the night or too early in the morning. This compounds depression and makes for increased tiredness and lethargy. This in turn will create more ruminations which will increase depression. Ruminations contain a wealth of distorted thoughts like negative self-labeling, all-or-nothing-thinking, shoulding, horribilizing, and can't stand it-itis. The Rumination Breaker, in breaking down and integrating ruminative trances, combines: *An emotional writing exercise which integrates the ruminative emotions and distorted thinking. *A method for recognizing and desensitizing specific thought distortions common to rumination. *A replacement pattern of positive memories to start a climb back to a good mood. (c) Steve Mensing Mirika Chen Unregistered User (10/13/05 9:06 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, In step one write out your ruminations--the negative internal chant you have about yourself, events, the world, the future. Write them in a notebook or on your computer. Write them quickly without any censoring. Let them flow out of your pen or computer. Describe what you think and feel during your ruminations. Love, Mirika Chen THE RUMINATION BREAKER The steps to the Rumination Breaker: (1) Write out your ruminations in a spiral bound notebook or write them out on your computer. Write them free form without any attempt to censor them. Let them come bubbling out. Describe completely how you feel and think. Let yourself feel what you're writing. Leave no stone unturned. Albert Venhoven Unregistered User (10/14/05 6:25 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Greetings: The second step- During your brief emotional writing process pay attention to any thought distortions you find. Learn to recognize these common distortions. Either question the beliefs or write the beliefs out over and over while you're in a relaxed and neutral state. This activity, like the Belief Repeater Process, will desensitize the emotional charge on these distorted beliefs and break the rumination cycle. If you want to use the Belief Repeater Process, instead of writing the distortions out, it's posted after the list of thought distortions. A list of the most common ruminative distortions will be posted immediately after step (3). There is a longer list of thought distortions in "Tips on Thought Distortions" Albert Venhoven Ganjeeli Unregistered User (10/14/05 1:22 pm) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost Ganjeeli TIPS FOR FINDING DISTORTED THINKING DISTORTED THINKING CHECK LIST Language and its meaning is highly important in creating our emotional reactions and sensations. Cues that we are employing distorted and upsetting thoughts can be found in difficulty creating evaluations. Automatic & habitual, difficulty creating evaluations occur without reason or reflection. Here is a checklist of words and phrases we use in absolutistic and upsetting evaluations: AWFULIZING: Here we make inconveniences or discomfort into disasters, catastrophes, something awful, horrible, or terrible. When awfulizing we magnify our problems and fail to notice the positive or the neutral in our experience. Awful, horrible, and terrible generally imply 100% negative experiences. Very few experiences are fully awful. Believing a situation is awful will make it feel that way. Most so-called awful experiences could be made much worse. If you awfulize you could see your experience as "inconvenient", a "hassle", or "uncomfortable". "Difficult" & "tough" also work better. Typical awfulizing words: awful, horrible, terrible, disaster, holocaust, the worst, doom, total hell, catastrophe, the pits. To test your situation to see if it is really awful--ask the following questions: *Does feeling awful actually prove the situation is awful? *Does your belief create your feelings of awfulness or horribleness? *What is your exact prediction? Specifically what will happen? *What if your thought were true? Why would it disturb you? Specifically what would happen? *If you believed the event was inconvenient, would you feel differently? *Is this event as horrible as I'm allowing myself to believe that it is? *Would other people experience this situation different than you? *Is there anything positive or neutral in your situation? A valuable learning experience? *How long will your situation last? Can you cope with it? *How is a disadvantage or inconvenience awful? *Could this situation be made much worse? *Is this circumstance difficult or unbearable, unpleasant or devastating, uncomfortable or intolerable? *Is there evidence that would dispute this belief? *If the worst occurs, can you consider other options or plans of action? Could you cope with it? *How does your difficulty compare with: (1) Being roasted slowly? (2) Dieing gradually and agonizingly from a rare disease? (3) Seeing loved ones paraded into slavery? (4) Being tortured slowly by aliens from another galaxy? *Is your situation truly awful or is it an inconvenience? CAN'T STAND IT-ITIS: Here we use evaluations like: "I can't stand it." "It's too much." "I can't take it." "It's driving me out of my mind." "It's overwhelming me." "When will this ever stop?" With these phrases we make uncomfortable and frustrating circumstances into unbearable ones. "Can't stand it-itis" resides at the core of impatience and frustration intolerance. If you're doing something that better be done and you feel extremely frustrated, you might think: "I can stand it." "It's not too much." "I can take it." "I can hang in there." "I've stood it before." "Much of life is challenging--I can put up with it." Typical can't stand it-itis phrases are: "I can't stand it." "I can't take it. " "This's driving me crazy." "I'm being overwhelmed." "When will this ever end?" "This's killing me." "I'm going out of control." "Life should be easy." See if you can really stand your situation by answering these questions: *Could you stand it? Have you stood it before? *Have you coped with a similar situation? *Could you stand it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *If your brain is healthy--can you really go crazy or would you just get upset? *Have you ever lived without it? *What would be the easiest part of this situation to bare? The second easiest part to bare? *Have I ever coped with similar situations? *Where's the evidence that it's too much? *Can you stand it for a minute at a time? *If a miracle happened and you could stand and cope with this situation, what would you notice about this situation? How would you feel about this situation? SHOULDING: Here we elevate desires and preferences into arbitrary and ironclad laws such as shoulds, musts, oughts, got to's, and deserves. Shoulding offers us little choice, creates pressures, and leads to anger, guilt, and shame. With shoulds we create new rules and play Jehovah with ourselves and others. If we are shoulding, we better use: "want", "prefer", "desire", "would strongly like", or "better do". Understand that everything is always as it SHOULD be. You may not enjoy the present, yet you better accept the idea that everything required to create current reality was done. The present SHOULD have occurred as it is now. It is unrealistic and playing GOD to believe that reality SHOULD not have happened the way it happened. Reality is as it exists. Every prerequisite was met. To demand "it" SHOULD not have taken place will upset you and buy you 2 problems for the price of 1. And by demanding "it" SHOULD not have occurred, you fail to accept what happened. If we don't like the present, we may alter it if possible and prevent what occurred from happening in the future. Reasonable "shoulds" refer to current reality and can be observed clearly by others. Unreasonable "shoulds" are based on the idea that things SHOULD occur because we demand they do. Not based on present observations, unreasonable shoulds are often grounded in the notion that what is correct for us is right for everyone. Example: Mensing's truths should work for everybody. Typical should phrases: "I should." "They must." "The world ought." "I've got to." "They have to." "They deserve." To test your "should" laws & rules--ask the following questions: *What law in the universe says you must or they should? *What evidence is there that you or they must or should? *Who or what creates this commandment? *Would a want or a preference give you or them more of a choice? *Does being demanding and unyeilding motivate you or others? *How would you talk a friend out of this must or should? *Are there others who don't share your "should" rule? *Do you down yourself or others for not living up to your demanding rule? *Is your should rule humane? *Would you apply this same rule to someone you loved or was a friend? *Is this belief based on facts or is it reflexive and negatively judgemental? *Where is it written that what you want, you must get? *What are the advantages and disadvanteges in choosing to prefer or want over shoulding or musting? LABELING: Here we overgeneralize with the "verb to be" about ourselves, others, things, events, & the world. Example: "I'm no good." "I'm worthless." "I'm a failure." "They are slobs." "New York is a totally sick place." "Everything is no good." By overgeneralizing with "labeling" we, they, or it becomes one behavior, trait or quality. Example: I failed a geometry test--I'm a failure. Or they behaved badly--they are bad. Sometimes we might label the world, things, and events with an overgeneralized tag. Example: Philadelphia is a snake pit. Or my job is the pits. Obviously Philadelphia and jobs contain far more than negative qualities. If we label, it is better to choose labels that carry the notion that we and everything in this world are multi-faceted and contain many, many positive, neutral, and negative qualities. Recommended labels for the self: "I'm a multi-faceted person." "I'm a person with many positive, neutral, and some negative qualities." "I'm human with a wide range of qualities." These labels apply to others as well. Recommended labels for things, events, and the world: "It is multi-faceted." "It has many positive, neutral, and negative qualities." If you are labeling, ask yourself the following questions: *Do you have millions of traits & behaviors? Are some negative, positive, or even neutral? *How can you just be one or a few traits & behaviors? *Can you choose not to rate yourself by a gross overgeneralization? *Is viewing yourself as just one or a few traits an overgeneralization? *List some of your many positive & neutral traits & behaviors. *Is it arbitrary to assign points to a trait or a behavior? How many points do you get added or subtracted for fallen arches? NEGATIVE PREDICTIONS/FORTUNE TELLING. You predict the future will provide failure or danger. "I'll screw things up and I'll fail." "I won't get employment." "She'll drop me like a hot potatoe." *What exactly is your prediction? When and where will it happen? *Is there any evidence that it won't happen or that it will happen? Is the evidence good enough? *Are you using any thought distortions to support the belief? *Could you survive and accept this prediction even if the worst happened? *Isn't it always possible that something good or bad could happen to me? *Have you ever made incorrect predictions previously? *What is the worst, best, and most probable outcome? *Write out three possible outcomes in detail. NEGATIVE HINDSIGHT/SHOULD'VE DONE BETTER IN THE PAST: Here we believe we should've done better or said the right thing. "I should've known better." "I should've never said that." Some questions to check out negative hindsight? *Did I really know better at the time? *What exactly was my regret? *Does having negative hindsight motivate me to do better now or am I just chastising myself? *What's the evidence for and against my negative hindsight? What's the quality of that evidence? *Should you know what to do or say everytime? Is that humanly possible? *Can you really fortell how things turnout or never make errors? *Did you make a good choice given the information and how you felt at that time? Didn't your choice seem right or mostly right at that time? *How does making a mistake magically turn you into a negative label? *Would it be more beneficial to find a way to do better next time instead of pounding on yourself with a negative label? *What did you learn from the event? Can you do better the next time you run into similar circumstances? NEEDING NONNECESSITIES: Here we employ words like need, must have, got to have, require, and can't do without. Our desires and wants become elevated into needs and dire neccessities (water, food, oxygen etc.) for living and for happiness. Feelings of desperation and craving are set off by needing nonnecessities. Overcome this challenge by knowing you desire or want what you don't truly need. Better use words like: "want", "desire", "prefer", & "would strongly like." If you have been needing nonneccessities, ask yourself the following questions: *Would you die if you did not have it? *Is this truly necessary for survival or enjoyment? *Is this an important as food, oxygen, & protection from the elements? *Could you find pleasure doing something else or being with someone else? *Does your feelings of desperation or craving actually prove you need something or do they reflect your belief that you "need" something? *Is this something you need or something you want? *Can you accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving & caring manner? ABSOLUTIZING: With this challenge we employ words like always, never, all the time, forever, totally, continually, not ever, eternally, unceasingly, absolute, incessant, completely, entire, whole, and unrelenting. Absolutizing words mean 100% of the time with no exceptions. Often these words are linked to anger, depression, and impatience. Example: Victor is "never" on time. Or Sally "always" gets it wrong. If we are absolutizing we better use more accurate words like: "frequently", "infrequently", "sometimes", "often", "a good deal of the time", "every once in awhile", "intermittently", and "partially". These words lead to less upsetting emotional responses. If you are absolutizing, ask yourself the following questions: *Does this happen sometimes, frequently, or even infrequently? *What percentage of the time does this occur? *What would the frequency of occurance appear like on a guage? *Is it really the entire situation or just a part or a percentage of it? *You mean always, in every single instance? *Does it ever stop? Has it ever stopped before? MIND READING/JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS: We assume we know another's thoughts, motivations, and feelings without them actually telling us or against their protests. When we jump to conclusions we base our conclusions on slim or no evidence. Trying to read another's mind or making inferences based on little evidence are samples of this kind of thinking. Example: She loves me because she smiled at me. Another form of mind reading is assuming that others should be able to read your mind and know what you're thinking, feeling, and intending without you having to tell them. If we tend to jump to conclusions, better examine our evidence closely or make sure we have enough. Better yet is to ask specifically what the other person is thinking, feeling, or intending. Otherwise we run the risk of seeing them in a distorted fashion. We may project others from our past onto mindread persons or we may project our own thoughts, feelings and intentions. Problems with mind reading may start when we: *Make conclusions based on past behavior. *Make conclusions based on the assumption of what we would think and feel in the same position. *Make a conclusion on what you desire the answer to be. *Make a conclusion on insufficient evidence or data. *Make a conclusion based on cultural stereotypes or personality differences. *Make a conclusion based on misperceiving what you see or hear. Ask yourself these questions when you assume you know what the other person is feeling, thinking, and intending: *Is what you believe they're thinking or feeling something they actually told you? *What's the evidence that this is going to happen or you going on an untested assumption? *How do you specifically know she or she thinks or feels this way? *Is it possible that these might be your own thoughts and feelings and not his/hers? Or do these thoughts and feelings seem like they belong to someone else in the past? *Describe in specifics what you believe they believe. *Have you ever been wrong at mind reading before? *What's the evidence for and against reading another's mind? *If the loss of approval is involved, how do you know they disapprove you? *How might you feel and behave differently if you didn't practice mind reading? *Are there any thought distortions you're using to support your assumption that you know what they're thinking, feeling, or intending? *Is there a pattern of thinking others don't like or approve? IMPOSSIBLE-IZING: Here we make difficult tasks into impossible tasks by using words like too difficult, too hard, impossible, unbelievably hard, too much, can't, and not a chance. Ask yourself if you could complete the task with the help of a support team, machines, or computers. Perhaps the task could be completed if you had new information. Further, could you complete the task if you just stuck with it or knew you would receive 2 million dollars or some other valuable reward? How would the task look to you if you broke it down into small manageable units rather that an overwhelming whole? Is it really impossible if you did it step by step? Remove "too" from difficult, hard, and much. Replace "can't" with can and will do. If you are impossible-izing, we better use words such as: "can", "possible", "possible with help", "difficult", "hard", "manageable", and "stong possibility". If you are impossible-izing, ask yourself the following questions: *Can you view the task in small manageable units and do it step by step? *Could you do it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *Could you complete the task if your life depended on it? *Could you do the task if you had more information, a brain trust, computer support, large machinery, a team, or some other form of assistance? *Is it really impossible? Has anyone accomplished this before? *If you previously made mistakes, does it hold that you will always make the same mistake? *Was a previous failure just an unwanted result or learning experience on the way to your goal? DESERVINGNESS: With this challenge we believe we have a @#%$ from the universe that entitles us to get what we desire. Typical deservingness words are: deserve, special, merit, worthy of, right to, should have, mandate, or must get. Such thoughts fire up entitlement and anger. We may want or desire something, yet that does not prove we merit it. If you believe you deserve, better use words like: "want", "prefer", "desire", or "would strongly like to have". If you have the challenge of deservingness, ask yourself: *Where did you get the @#%$? *Does the universe single you out as a special case? *Where is the proof that you deserve? *Are you ordained, exempted, or certified special? By whom or what? *What happens if the person you are dealing with also has a special @#%$? *Who or what creates your deservingness? *Where is it written in the Bible that you are a special case? DISBELIEF: With this style of thinking we erase the reality of a situation. In unbelief we refuse to accept what happened as really what happened. Here we deny and create feelings of unreality and numbness. When we are practicing unbelief we use such words as: unreal, I can't believe it, unbelievable, this should not be happening, weird, wacky, incredible, implausable, and absurd. Better accept the reality of the situation and deal with the absolutistic thinking and imagery that may be occurring. Better use words like: "this is really happening", "real", "believable", "credible", "part of life", "this really should be happening". If you use Disbelief, ask yourself the following questions: *Why should this not have happened? *Where is the evidence this is unbelievable? *If it happened, why must it not have happened? *What would two other observers tell you about what just took place? *If all the prerequisites were there, what is the evidence it should not have occurred? UNFAIR & UNJUST: Believing others act unfairly or unjustly toward you, is buying the notion that everyone shares the same vision of fairness or justice. Observe labor/management disputes. Both sides often believe their wants are fair and just, yet their visions are seldom in agreement. Demanding fairness or justice is another form of shoulding or deservingness. Typical unfair & unjust words are: unfair, unjust, isn't right, inequitable. If we are employing unfair & unjust, we better use words like: "prefer", "want", "desire", and "would strongly like". If you employ unfair & unjust thinking, ask yourself the following questions: *Does everyone share the same view of justice or fairness? *Is there a universal rule of justice that everyone recognizes? *Have you observed people or parties disagree over what's right, fair, or just? *Why must others hold your view? OVERGENERALIZING: Here several instances of a category are seen as an entire category. Overgeneralizing comes in two basic flavors. (1) An event happens and we conclude it will occur again & again. Example: I got fired, I'll always be fired. (2) You evaluate yourself, another person, or the world by one or a few traits. Example: I got rejected, I'm a reject. If you overgeneralize, focus on: (1) Frequency of occurence. This will give you a more realistic view. (2) That you recognize everything and every person possesses positive, neutral, and negative qualities. Here's some questions you can ask: *Are you or they just one trait or several, or many like most people? *Just because it happened once before, does it follow that it will ALWAYS happen? *How often does this happen? *How would the frequency of happening appear on a guage set from 1 to 20 with 1 being "not happening" and 20 "happening all the time". *What do you specifically predict about another's behavior? *What's the evidence for and against this belief? What's the quality of that evidence? *Do others see this situation the same way? VIEWING ONLY THE NEGATIVE: This mindset has us seeing only the negative while filtering out the positive. Example: My wife did 7 really helpful things for me today, yet I only recall her failure to take a message when someone called. If you sometimes view only the negative, practice looking at what good or neutral things are happening in your life. You may want to make daily lists for several weeks to remind yourself of what is positive and neutral. Here's some questions you can ask yourself: *Did positive or neutral things happen? *If someone else was watching this situation, what positive or neutral things might they notice? *What's the evidence for and against noticing only the negatives? What's the quality of that evidence? *Would others see this situation the same way? *Notice what's positive and keep a daily record of it. *What are the advantages and disadvantages of viewing only the negative? *What information are you ignoring or denying? *What happens to you if you acknowledge positives and neutrals? *What would happen if everyone adopted a code of viewing only the negative? BLACK & WHITE THINKING: Events are seen in black & white only with no neutral shades of gray. Or we see either/or situations, all or nothing, or one way or the other. These kinds of thinking signal we are not recognizing middle grounds, gray zones, average, or neutral areas. Most events don't occur in black or white or all-or-nothing terms without middle grounds. A black & white thinking example: If he's not a good guy, then he's a crook. Or if my performance wasn't great, then it stunk. If your thinking sometimes goes to blacks & whites, look at average, middle grounds, neutral, and gray areas. Here's some questions you can ask yourself: *Is there something average going on here? *Do you notice a middle ground? *How about a gray area? *Does this impose inhuman standards? *Can you define exactly what your labels are? (Loser, worthless, great guy, superman). Where does you label actually fit on a scale between 1 and 20? *How much of the time is the negative label true? *What is the evidence for and against this kind of thinking? *How would you prove black and white thinking is incomplete? FAULT FINDING: Here we hunt for someone or something to blame. Example: If I didn't send Bobo to art school I'd be a millionaire. In fault finding we generally believe in one cause and one effect. Actually if we look at a situation from different perspectives we can find multiple causes and multiple effects. Fault finding is a serious waste of time that hampers finding solutions. Often when fault finding is applied to a person, we label that person and defocus from the behaviors that require change. The human brain is a wonderful device. It can come up with tons of causes, effects, and reasons after the fact. Fault finding, when applied to people, creates anger and guilt. It wastes energy better spent on solutions and changes in behavior. If you sometimes find fault, blame the entire universe for 2 seconds, then focus on what requires change. Here's questions we can ask ourselves: *What were some of the other possible causes? *Would someone else see someone or something else to blame? *Is there a solution to find, rather then spend time blaming? *What is your specific blaming statement? *What is the evidence that supports your belief? What is the quality of it? *Considering possible causes of the event, what is the percentage of blameworthiness the person(s), situations, luck, mechanical failure, gravity, ect COMPARING: We build others up so we can compare ourselves to them and then put ourselves down. Or we build ourselves up and put them down. Example: Freddy owns a mansion and a yacht and all I have is a surfboard. I must be a loser. Comparing is another waste of energy. When we compare we are buying labels. Every person has positive, neutral, and negative aspects. If you tend to compare, then look at what is good or right with you or the other person. Here's questions to ask yourself: *What's good about you? *What's good about the other person? *What is your specific statement or judgement? NIXING THE POSITIVE: Here we explain away positive events. Example: I would not have passed the test unless I got lucky. Or winning the Nobel Prize was nothing much--I had terrific lab equipment. If you tend to nix the positive, practice accepting what good comes your way. Note how your efforts were involved in the positive outcome. Here's questions to ask yourself: *What was your responsibility for this good thing happening? *Can you begin to notice the good things you did? *What is the evidence for and against nixing the positives? *Would you count these qualities or behaviors as positives if someone you really loved, liked, or admired had them or did them? *What specifically are you discounting? *Keep a record of postives in a daily log. What do you notice after 7 days? GUT THINKING: Here you base your evidence on your surface feelings. Feelings can be as distorted as the beliefs, images, and thoughts creating them. Feelings are not facts nor are they deeper intuitions. Your feelings mirror your attitudes and if your attitudes are distorted, you can guarantee your evidence will also be distorted. Example: I feel in my bones this isn't going to be my year. Or I feel like I'm going to get assassinated if I go to next week's Shriner's meeting. Examples of gut thinking: *I feel stupid. *It feels like nothing will ever change. If you tend to gut think, check out the beliefs & images behind your feelings. Look at the evidence. *Examine your specific gut thought. *What's the difference between an emotion and a fact? *What's the evidence for and against gut thinking? What's the quality of that evidence? *What advice might you offer a friend who relied on their emotions to decide about reality? Here's some questions to ask yourself: *Because something feels true or real, does that make it true or real? *Where's the evidence that because something feels real, that it is real? *Haven't people felt and believed the Earth is flat and that the Sun revolved around the Earth? EXPANDING: Here we exaggerate small weaknessness or defects. Example: Making an error on the spelling bee was a disaster! Or my left nostril is slightly larger than the other--it destroys my face. If we expand, let us look at these deficiencies in the light of the larger context and accept what we can't change. Let us take into consideration what works and what is positive. Here's questions to ask yourself: *Is this an exaggeration? *Am I making this larger than it actually is? *How might others view this? CONTRACTING: Here we minimize assets or diminish the positive. Example: Winning the Super Bowl 3 years straight was nothing much. Or sure she's brainy, but she never uses it. If we contract the positive, let us accept what is positive and enjoy it. *Am I minimizing what I do? *How might others view this? EXPECTATION/ASSUMPTIONS: With this style of thinking we expect or assume a certain outcome and notice only minimal supporting evidence. Usually this evidence confirms your anxieties, fears, anger, or predjudices. You gloss over or ignore other explanations or potential solutions. Example: "Going on this job interview will lead to nothing." Often assumptions are constructed from popular beliefs, yet untested beliefs. Assumptions form the basis of some decisions and ways we filter our experience. *How can I know the future without being there? *What are the other possible outcomes? Are there possible positive or neutral outcomes? PERFECTIONISM: We believe we can be perfect and live up to a superhuman standard. This thinking does not account for our innate tendency to make errors. Example: I should perform flawlessly and never make mistakes. If you tend toward perfectionism, recognize you are a fallible human who can only do his or her human best. You do not need to be perfect to accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving and caring manner. Here's some questions to ask yourself? *What law in the universe says you must be perfect or perform perfectly? *Are not mistakes valuable learning experiences? *Can you learn from your mistake and do it over? EMOTIONAL IRRESPONSIBILITY: We make others and events the sole cause of our emotional reactions instead of seeing the role our evalautions and beliefs play in the intensity and duration of our emotional states. Because of this we may mistakenly try to control others to control our emotions. *Isn't the way I think about this situation impacting on how I feel? *What do I believe here? Doesn't it make me feel a certain way? *Where is the evidence that I'm completely responsible for this? PERMANENT CONDITIONS: Taking a temporary or time limited situation and transforming it into a permanent condition. Examples: *I lost my job--I'll never work again. *She shot my proposal down--I'll never be married. *Have I ever delt with something like this in the past and did it change? *How much will this effect my life 12 months from now? Questions to ask yourself: *Isn't this a time-limited situation? *Is this a failure or is it feedback about my progress? *How permanant is this situation? *Could things change? PERSONALIZING is a cognitive distortion where we: (1) Interpreting innocent comments, questions, and behavior of others as an attack on ourselves, our abilities, our appearance, what we own, and personal worth. Example: Betsy tells Mary that her hair looks great today. Mary concludes her hair looked terrible previously. (2) We take personally random events and view them as attacks on us. Example: "That my dog got out of the yard proves I'm a bad pet owner." (3) We attribute a a large portion of blame to ourselves without noticing that certain events may also be caused by others. Example: My job ended because I failed. Personalizing leads to hurt, anger, guilt, lost opportunities to connect with others, and an inability to notice other folks points of view. To end personalizing it helps to learn to accept ourselves and to notice the cognitive distortion "personalizing". When we notice we're "personalizing we can ask ourselves questions like: *What evidence or ideas make you believe this? *Is there such a thing as dumb luck? *Does taking things personally motivate you? *What's the evidence for and against personalizing? What is the quality of that evidence? *Could their comments be meant positively? What did they specifically say? *What's the evidence that their comments or laughter were aimed at you? Could it have been about someone else? *Are we hyperalert for others disapproving of us? Are we vigilant for or expecting negative evaluations from others? Have fun, Steve Emmon Coughlin Unregistered User (10/15/05 5:34 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Good afternoon, Step three: Recall 10 to 12 very pleasant memories in a row from your past. These may come from your school days, friends, family, work, favorite hobbies, or any other area of your life. Recall these good times from start to finish just once. The Rumination Breaker ends with you moving to an upbeat mood. Emmon Coughlin Dale Brewer Unregistered User (10/15/05 10:55 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi all, The Rumination breaker can be used on worry and dwelling on anxious, guilty, or shameful thoughts. Dale Brewer Bettina Kohler Unregistered User (10/16/05 10:45 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, Breaking rumination is especially effective for sound sleep. Use the Rumination Breaker right before bedtime to defeating over REMing or overdreaming which leads to early rising and poor sleep. Bettina Kohler Jim Unregistered User (10/17/05 11:58 am) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi all, Last year when the Rumination Breaker was posted Steve recommended that ruminative thoughts could be made funny by exaggeration. Saying them aloud with a funny high pitched voice and accenting their verbs. Saying them rapidly. Jim Martin Hauck Unregistered User (10/18/05 2:52 pm) Getting the most out of the Rumination Breaker. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, Writing out ruminations brings their thoughts into the open. Saying the thoughts loudly while you write them out helps to disempower them. Martin Hauck Edited by: Emowebby at: 4/17/06 8:39 pm Aimee Unregistered User (3/6/06 9:16 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, The Depression Superthread p203.ezboard.com/femoclea...ID=8.topic Aimee James Detweiler Unregistered User (3/7/06 7:26 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost Carol asks: "What does the future appear like for self-help methods for anxiety and moderate depression?" **Warning: Persons with depression should have it checked by a therapist for a number of reasons including the possibility it may triggered by physical illnesses and hormonal inbalances. Anyone with suicidal thoughts should immediately seek therapy.** Carol right now folks have a large array of valuable self-help methods that can help with anxiety and moderate depression. Emoclear provides a large collection and many excellent self-help materials in the form of books, videos, and software are available from Cognitive Therapy, REBT, Dialectal-Behavior Therapy, Positive Psychology, and a slew of others. In the coming years new and improved methods are sure to come and more self-help materials will arrive for the motivated self-learner. Take care, Steve Aaron Kallish Unregistered User (3/8/06 11:51 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost Leon asks: "Can emotional problems be set off by Adult ADD? Like anxiety and depression? Excessive anger and irritibility?" Leon Adult ADD, in it's diverse forms, is frequently linked to anxiety and depression as well as excessive anger and irritibility. Imagine if you suffered from several of these challenges and how they would impact on your emotions: *Excessive daydreaming. *Problems with memory and forgetting important things to be done. *Procrastination. *Easily distracted. *Misperceiving what others say and do. *Has trouble paying attention when others are talking. *Disorganized, sloppy. *Little sense of time. (Late for work, school) *Careless mistakes. *Sense of apathy and boredom. *Appears preoccupied to others. *Fidgety. *May ramble and be unfocused when talking. *Impulse control problems. *Has trouble seeing future consequences. *Excessive worry. *May be defensive and argumentative. *Tendency toward rumination and excessive negativity. *May exhibit compulsive behavior. *Can hang onto grudges. *Fails to see other options and viewpoints. *Repeats self-defeating behavior. *Quick temper with little apparent provocation. *Periods of confusion. *Low energy and moody. *Lacks self-acceptance. *May be overly sensitive to light, sound, and touch. Take care, Steve Gary Holtzman Unregistered User (3/9/06 10:44 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost Modus asks: "What sets off most depression? Why are some more prone to it?" Modus from what I've seen it appears that several elements are behind the creating most depressions. *The way folks distortedly evaluate events and themselves has a large impact on depression making. Negative and distorted beliefs have an impact on our brain chemistry and moods. Having a pessimistic view raises the probability of depression. *Rumination or that negative and repetitive inner chant alters brain chemistry. If someone ruminates prior to sleep time there's a good chance they'll overdream that night which leads to poor sleep and early waking. Both of which create fatigue and add to depression. This is why applying the brakes to rumination prior to sleeptime is important. *Inaction and not doing important and meaningful activities often leads to more negative thinking and a sense of being stuck. These have an effect on brain chemistry and mood. *Being out of social connection with others often leads to more negative thinking and a sense of stuckness. These impact on brain chemistry and mood. *Other elements such as poor sleep, high stress, poor eating habits, and a lack of exercise can effect brain chemistry and mood. "Why are some more prone to depression?" Likely because they've learned distorted and pessimistic ways of thinking and made them habits. These automatic thoughts get applied to events, themselves, others, and the world. They also learned to base taking action on how they feel. If they don't feel good, they don't take action. This poor habit leads to stuckness and more distorted and negative thoughts. The keys to breaking out of depression are: *Changing our negative and distorted evaluations. Dumping pessimism as a philosophy of life. *Take important, meaningful, and pleasurable action even when we don't initially feel like it. *Breaking rumination especially at sleeptime. *Sleeping well, eating healthyfully, and exercising. *Keeping our social relationships alive even when we're not feeling so hot at first. Take care, Steve Jim Unregistered User (3/13/06 12:04 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost. Don37 asks: "Does depression damage the brain and shorten life span?" Don37 according to studies depression is said to "age" the brain. Researchers recognize that depression is stressful and lowers immune response. Chronically depressed persons have higher incidences of Alzheimers, cardiovascular disease, Cancer, illnesses, and are said to have shorter life spans. If someone has depression they better do their utmost with therapy and self-therapy to get out of the distorted thinking, inactivity, and rumination that makes for depressed brain chemistry. Depression is not just dark mindedness and low energy, it creates stress and health problems. Take care, Steve Alyce Waters Unregistered User (3/13/06 5:00 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost. ASP asks: "What causes people suffering from depression to have poor memories?" ASP several factors may lead to depressed folks having a struggle with memory. The most common are: *State dependent memory. Persons with mood disorders like depression may have challenges recalling events that occurred in an upbeat mood. They'd have to return to that upbeat state to recall those events. This is why very depressed persons sometimes can't recall ever being happy or positive events. *Depressed individuals may be very distracted by their ruminations. Rumination, because it often dominates attention, can blunt memory making. Rumination can also block recall. *Certain neurochemicals, lacking in depressed folks, are needed to form short-term and long-term memories. *Depression's fatigue can make it difficult to pay attention to events and information which leads to memory deficits. *A depressed mood and depression's distorted thinking can distort incoming information and make memories inaccurate. Take care, Steve Eric Unregistered User (3/14/06 4:23 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cyril asks: "In your estimation what are the most powerful non medication ways to get out of depression? Cyril combining several of the following approaches can be helpful with depression: *Halting rumination is very important. Rumination creates havoc with our sleep and leaves us waking early and exhausted. Rumination's hypnotic chant helps convice depressed folks of their depressing beliefs about themselves, their circumstances, and the world. Further this onslught of automatic negative thoughts helps keep brain chemistry depressed. The Emoclear Rumination Breaker is one method for overcoming rumination. *Learning to recognize and change depressive beliefs can be helpful in overcoming depressive thinking which effects our brain chemistry. *Exercise like walking, running, and other aerobic activities have a powerful impact on our brain chemistry and gives exercisers a sense of control over their lives. *Getting up and doing important, meaningful, and pleasurable activities no matter how we feel at first. *Learning to accept ourselves unconditionally and treat ourselves in caring and loving ways. *Enjoying the comraderie of friendships. Take care, Steve Albert Venhoven Unregistered User (3/15/06 10:39 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposted by Albert. HLustigABX asks: "How can someone rapidly elevate their mood even during a down period in their life?" HLustigABX the quickest ways to elevate our mood even during trying times is to do any of the following: *Recall 12 or so pleasurable or fun events in a row. Generally this will elevate our mood quickly. *Become absorbed in a fun and pleasurable activity. *Use the StateMaker to recreate a state which involves an elevated mood. Like the state you were happiest. *Use our Limbic Mood Elevator. *Brisk walking, running, and aerobics can lift our moods quickly. Take care, Steve James Detweiler Unregistered User (3/16/06 9:28 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost. Scott asks: "Could positive visualizations effect brain chemistry and depression?" Scott positive visualizations, like imagining completing important or meaningful tasks or picturing pleasurable images, could certainly effect brain chemistry and help release depressive ruminations' foothold. Take care, Steve Gary Holtzman Unregistered User (3/16/06 10:09 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nina asks: "What would you say were the 5 most useful self-help approaches for depression?" Nina regular depression can be turned around by altering thoughts, behavior, and emotional intensity/duration. The 5 most useful self-help methods for depression are: *Stopping rumination: The Rumination Breaker. Ending the repetitive negative inner chant of rumination a person can make great strides in overcoming depression. Especially important is turning off rumination prior to bed where rumination can do most of it's damage by causing overdreaming and early waking. I recommend the Rumination Breaker or writing down your ruminative thoughts to put the brakes on rumination. Stopping rumination improves mood and raises our energy levels. *Halting distorted thinking and depression creating Personality Clusters: "Tips on Distorted Thinking" and Personality Cluster work. Being able to recognize and change distorted and absolutistic thinking goes a long way in blocking the kinds of distorted thinking that negatively effects our perceptions, brain chemistry, moods, energy levels, and outlook. Key Personality Cluster targets are the clusters: "Negativity", "Self-Acceptance", "Apathy", "Abandonment", "Emotional Deprivation", "Loneliness", "Perfectionism", "Failure", and "Vulnerable". *Natural mood elevation through exercise (Walking, running, aerobics), good sleeping, pleasurable activities, recalling pleasurable times, and eating high protein-low carb meals earlier in the day. *Taking action on what's important, meaningful, pleasurable. Commiting to and following through on important and meaningful activities during the day. See "A Call to Action", "The Action Manuever" which show how to unhook from emotions and take action. Being absorbed in meaningful and important activities gives us a sense of control over our lives and elevates mood. Begin to notice what's positive now and in the near future. Creating goals and visions and carrying them out helps us put our attention on what's good and absorbing. See "The Creator" and "The Goal Maker" *Self-Acceptance. A major keystone in overcoming depression is being able to to accept ourselves (No negative self-labeling) and treat ourselves in a caring and loving manner. Take care, Steve Dale Brewer Unregistered User (3/17/06 1:39 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost. RemRem asks: "Is there a cheap and common supplement that's recently shown to block Seasonal Affective Disorder? Is it as good as light boxes?" RemRem "Sunshine" vitamin D appears to stop Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) according to recent research. More studies are required to confirm Vitamin D's abilities in this area. The vitamin seems to work as well as light boxes. Vitamin D is a cheap and easily available vitamin. Take care, Steve Julian Kammerz Unregistered User (3/18/06 8:21 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposted. **See a therapist if you suffer from depression symptoms. Some depression symptoms may be caused by medical challenges.** Julian asks: "What are the most important elements in defeating depression? Like what two or three activities should someone being doing to defeat depression and keep it away in the long-term?" Julian the most important activities that folks should undertake in overcoming depression in the long-term are: *Learning to spot and change distorted thinking has a proven major impact on depression. Stopping negative patterns of introspection is a key ingredient in uprooting depression. See our updated "Tips on Distorted Thinking". *Learning to pull the plug on rumination prior to be and breaking up ruminative thinking during the day has a major impact on depression. See our Rumination Breaker. *Learning to take action on what's important no matter how we feel. We need to learn to take action without waiting for the right mood, feeling good, or inspiration. See "A Call to Action" and the "Action Method". *Getting sound sleep and eating well helps. Slightly less important, but still valuable for folks struggling with depression: *Taking up mood elevation activities like walking, running, aerobics, and doing what we exerience as important, meaningful, and pleasurable. See Integration Walking and the Limbic Mood Elevator. *Learning social skills, how to express your thoughts and feelings, and assertiveness can build the important bridge with others and make our wants and needs known. *Processing Personality Clusters, which contribute to depression, can have a large impact on repetitive distorted thinking. Shutting down negative distorted thinking removes depression's fuel line. *Behavior repatterning. Certain kinds of behavior like inactivity, procrastination, and rumination heighten depression. Doing behavioral repatterning with the Pattern Tree, the Habit Cracker, or Neural Repatterner can halt stuck and self-defeating behavior. Take care, Steve Julian Kammerz Unregistered User (3/18/06 8:27 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposted. Gary asks: "Could installing beliefs, positive personality Clusters, or attitudes help blunt or stop depression? Does this happen naturally when Personality Clusters and distorted beliefs are integrated or processed out? Gary the installation of undistorted beliefs in the place of distorted beliefs, the replacement of Personality Clusters with positive Personality Clusters, and switching to more positive attitudes would have a strong effect on depression. Depressive and ruminative thinking is what changes folks neurochemistry and makes them depressed. Breaking the cycle of depressive and ruminative thinking would return someone to level and upbeat moods. "Does this happen naturally when Personality Clusters and distorted beliefs are integrated or processed out?" Gary Yes. Folks begin to evaluate their circumstances in an undistorted way. More options are available. Take care, Steve Julian Kammerz Unregistered User (3/18/06 8:30 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposted. Aimee asks: "How important is self-acceptance in overcoming depression?" Aimee developing self-acceptance is one of the most important keys to overcoming depression. I've never met anyone suffering from depression who wasn't engaged in using negative self-labels to down themselves. Rumination, that negative trance like thinking which preoccupies depressed persons, always includes a strong dose of self-downing. Learning to replace negative self-labeling with self-acceptance is frequently one of the major turning points in breaking depression's hold. When human beings learn to accept themselves regardless of their behavior and traits and stop making the thinking error of calling themselves worthless, no good, lazy, stupid, a loser, or some other negative label they will make progress toward coming out of depression. Depressed folks are greatly helped by: *Knowing they can choose to stop name calling and instead accept themselves. Better and more accurate to label our behaviors instead of ourselves. *Knowing our self can be separated from our behavior and traits is an important learning. A person can't be magically turned into negative label by making errors. I'm an idiot for failing a geography test. (This person may captain the chess club, be a Mensa member, and performed well on all of their other subjects, yet they goof up geography and they instantly become an idiot). More accurate to say I performed poorly on two geography tests, but I'm a fully acceptable human being with many good behaviors, neutral behaviors, and some poor behaviors in need of development. *Negative self-labeling is an ultra poor form of motivation because we come to believe we're a negative label and that's all we're capable of doing. Negative labeling makes us feel down with it's grossly distorted self-perception. Depressed persons have less energy from their negative rumination and self-downing. This makes it more difficult to learn from their mistakes and perform well. See the Self-acceptance Learn-in. Take care, Steve Bill Soltas Unregistered User (3/18/06 1:18 pm) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Repost. Nina asks: "What is the fastest route out of regular depression? What recommendations would you make?" **Folks with depression should check in with a counselor or therapist to have their condition evaluated. In some instances a medical condition may create depression like symptoms. Especially seek professional consultation if you have suicidal thoughts or are dwelling on death.** Nina it appears that regular depression (We're not discussing bipolar here) is caused by folks thinking styles, their behavior patterns, and the way they relate to others. Mainly depression arrives through dwelling on distorted and negative interpretations of the world around us, events, others, and ourselves. This negative focus/rumination appears to dimminish our ability to get sound sleep. This creates longer periods of REM sleep which makes it difficult get the quality of sleep we need to repair and feel energized the next day. Fatigue/depression sets in. Our brain chemistry changes. The quickest route out of regular depression is to take an all inlcusive approach which focuses upon: *Changing our thinking styles and how we explain events. Changing automatic distorted thoughts can have a profound effect on depression. Viewing the world with less distortion and not being caught up in negativity diminishes depression and is likely to keep it away. Challenging and changing beliefs can be accomplished with "Tips on Distorted Thinking". Processing beliefs with the Belief Repeater Method or denuding them of their emotional support with integrators can help move someone out of the depressive thinking loop. *Processing Personality Clusters, which contribute to depression, can have a large impact on repetitive distorted thinking. Shutting down negative distorted thinking removes depression's fuel line.. *Behavior repatterning. Certain kinds of behavior like inactivity, procrastination, and rumination heighten depression. Doing behavioral repatterning with the Pattern Tree, the Habit Cracker, or Neural Repatterner can halt stuck and self-defeating behavior. *Blocking rumination. Rumination during the day and prior to bedtime can make sound sleep difficult and lead to fatigue. Blocking rumination is an important ingredient in ending depression. Blocking rumination will speed getting over depression. See the Rumination Breaker on the Emoclear.com process page. *Being assertive, being able to express your thoughts and feelings, and having good interpersonal skills in place can help with depression. *Very important is getting sound sleep, exercise, and eating well. Being able to sleep well helps a great deal with ending depression. Exercise like walking, running, and aerobics will boost moods. Eating from all the food groups and investigating the possibility of eating more protein and less carbs in the mornings and afternoons may help with moods. *Consider doing rapid mood elevating exercises like: The Limbic Mood Elevator, The Electric Chair, Integration Walking or taking cold baths and showers to elevate your mood. *Research supplements like Omega 3 oils, walnut protein, and B-Complex vitamins. *Keep up with your goals and meaningful/important activites. Learn how to unhook yourself from your feelings to take up activities. See the Action Method, A Call to Action, and the "As If Action Method". *Learn problem solving and apply it. See the Multi-Solution Generator. *Refuse to get involved in negative and distorted intropection and rumination. Find replacement thinking patterns. *If you have PTSD or other traumas still operating in your life, get them processed. *Do more of what you find enjoyable, meaningful, and important. This helps crowd out the negative trances with a focus on what's pleasurable and important. Take care, Steve Emmon Coughlin Unregistered User (3/20/06 7:35 am) Reply Update the Depression Learn-in -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reposting What can be done for anhedonia? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What can be done for anhedonia? Anne Unregistered User (12/6/05 9:41 am) Reply What can be done for anhedonia? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi Phyllis, Anhedonia or the loss of joy is one of the signs of depression and stress burnout. Consult with a therapist if you're depressed just to make sure it isn't being caused by hormone problems or other non-event difficulties. Anhedonia usually passes when depression or burnout passes. See the Depression Learn-in. Very helpful for depression and anhedonia is controlling "over dreaming" or too much REM from ruminating prior to sleep time. The Rumination Breaker limits "over dreaming" and early morning waking. Insomnia is a kill joy. Exercise can help. Anne Jim Unregistered User (12/6/05 11:11 am) Reply What can be done for anhedonia? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi Some think anhedonia comes from certain brain chemicals being exhausted by steady fatigue from poor sleep during depression and stress burnout. This seems right. People suffering from depression and burnout often ruminate. Stopping rumination before bed time lets someone sleep right and replenish the brain chemical needed to experience pleasure and joy. The Rumination Breaker can help. Jim Hi all, The Rumination Breaker can stop rumination which is sometimes the cause of the anhedonia. Emmon Coughlin Kendra Unregistered User (12/6/05 7:36 pm) Reply What can be done for anhedonia? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This post is from Ask Steve. It talks about Anhedonia. Hiroshi asks: "A friend finds no pleasure or meaning in anything. He is not sour or bitter upon life. There is fatigue. Suggestions for this? He dutifully goes about life and work. There is no pleasure derived." Hiroshi your friend attempts any intervention he or she ought to make a visit to therapist and have this no pleasure, loss of meaning, and fatigue checked out. This is what's called anhedonia. Anhedonia may have various causes including: *Being dissociated or not being able to feel our feelings. *Bio-chemical challenges that inhibit pleasure. *Depression. Anhedonia may also appear concurrently with depression. *In some forms of schizophrenia anhedonia may be present. *Burnout is a common cause of the inibility to find pleasure and meaning. *Some forms of fatigue may stimulate anhedonia. For interventions see postings on: *Handling dissociation. A person may have to learn how to feel their feelings and acknowledge them. "Active Feeling" is a good place to start. *See posts on "burnout" and "workaholism" and how to handle them. *Depression. Check in with a therapist and get an evaluation. See the depression learn-in and the Rumination Breaker. *For fatigue see a medical doctor and have the fatigue checked out. There are posts about handling fatigue. *For loss of meaning, which is natural with anhedonia because we often can't feel emotions that would support meaning, do the meaning exercise. The exercise may be inhibited by the inability to experience feelings or experience pleasurable feelings. Take care, Steve Tim Grenier Unregistered User (12/7/05 9:45 am) Reply What can be done for anhedonia? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, A bigee in anhedonia is not being able to feel feelings. Go to the process page and find Learning to Feel Feelings. Some anhedonia is based on dissociation. Tim Grenier |
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Posts: 0 (05/20/02 12:14 PM) |
Emoclearians:
You've got a pretty good idea what depression is and where it comes from. I'll add in that food sensitivities and allergies can also increase the possibility of depression as can thyroid problems, certain medications, and blood pressure remedies. Poor sleep, high stress, and lack of exercise don't help much either. Let's move to what we can do to overcome depression with Emoclear approaches. Name a process and how it might be used in clearing or integrating depression. Leap in! William Tekada |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/20/02 03:38 PM) |
Hello,
Probably somone should understake several approaches in overcoming their depression. One of the most appealing to me would be Integration Walking because of it's ability to both raise your mood through exercise and to integrate emotions while you're walking. It's well known how certain kinds of exercise and aerobics can lift someone's mood. In fact there have been studies showing that walking and running seem to elevate mood as well or better than anti-depressant medications. Someone could focus on their down feelings and integrate them as they walked. It would seem that getting fresh air and sunlight would be a plus as well. Kyle D. |
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Unregistered(d) |
ClearWal;king and depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/21/02 12:16 AM) |
Emoclearins:
Integration Walking should be done to the point of feeling elevated and not tired out. Same with any aerobic exercise used to alter the down mood of depression. As Kyle noted Integration Walking has the added feature of the Emo Integrator style integrating process embedded in it. So INtegration Walking has a double wammy for depression. It also get someone up and moving which helps break that negative depressive chant and changes the depression pattern of laying around and being caught up in resisting the feeling. Getting up and doing something can have the secondary effect of helping the depressed person see they have some control over their life and the feeling. The Integration Walking shifts someone's mood on at least two levels. The integration of feeling and the exercise stimulation of neurotransmitters and even endorphins can rapidly help someone begin to turn their depression around. And of course the breaking of the negative chant, pattern breaking, and gaining some control are added attractions of Integration Waling. Personally Integration Walking might be one of the first things to reach for on reversing depression. A Call to Action and the Action Manuever has to be right up there too with the processors and integrators as being especially helpful in this area. Others will be talking about them in this learn-in. John Gastly INTEGRATION-WALKING The following process combines moderate to brisk walking with the Emo-Integrator. This process provides all the benefits of walking and integration. ***Warning: This process is not to be used with mental illness, severe trauma, or panic. You are only permitted to use this process if you agree to absolve the webmasters, Emoclear.com, Steve Mensing, and the web host of any responsibility for the application or misapplication of this process. As with any emotional or mental process there is always the outside possibility that the user will experience some discomfort.*** Copyright (c) Steve Mensing INTEGRATION-WALKING (1) WALK: Begin walking with a comfortable stride and with whatever breath rhythm that emerges. Your pace can be from moderate to brisk. Once you have settled into a good pace, then move to step (2) (2) ALLOW A FEELING TO FORM: As you walk allow a feeling or physical sensation to form. Continue on to step (3). (3)FULLY FEEL YOUR FEELING OR PHYSICAL SENSATION WITH NO INTENTION OF GETTING RID OF IT OR KEEPING IT: Take this no intention intention to whatever feeling or sensation shows up. Just fully feel your feeling and allow it to be there with no intention of getting rid of it or keeping it. The no intention intention is the ground floor of acceptance and love. Continue to step (4) (4) EXPERIENCE YOUR FEELING OR SENSATION AS "THAT MESSAGE": Label your feeling "That message". Here you will switch your attention on your feeling to a slightly outside position. You will be getting an overall felt sense of the feeling. Be aware that at any point in this process the emotional charge may blow out. It may come abruptly with a slight or mild jolt because of the energy evoked by both walking. Or it may slowly integrate. Move to step (5). (5)GAIN YOUR FEELING'S OR SENSATION'S RAPID INTUITIVE MESSAGE: Let yourself experience your feelings quick intutuitive message. Allow yourself to really be open here. What does the feeling let me know? What does it want me to do? Just get an intuitive felt sense here. Continue to step (6) (6) NOTICE WHETHER YOU ACCEPT YOUR FEELING/SENSATION OR LOVE IT: Although the feeling or sensation may have lost its emotional charge by now, if it hasn't, just pay full attention to it. At a visceral level you will either accept it or experience love toward it. Move to step (7) (7) BEGIN A NEW CYCLE: When you have integrated the first feeling/sensation, then repeat step (2) through step (6) and allow another feeling to form while you continue to walk. Remember: Through steady practice, each element will begin to feel natural. Have fun, Steve |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/21/02 07:33 AM) |
Greetings all.
The Personality Cluster "Negativity" may be useful for some with depression. Also see if other Personality Clusters fit. Personality Cluster processing with clearers or integrators could help a great deal. Personality Clusters can run big parts of the problem. The White Door would be useful to be run on depression thoughts. This energy processor may seem odd, but it is quite effective. In previous readings here I saw that doing this work several times a day seems to help with some forms of depression. With the energy processors all you have to do is tune into the thoughts of depression. The Annihilator is another help. Albert Venhoven |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression learn-in. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/21/02 11:23 PM) |
Hey Emoclearians:
The Cardio Integrator and the Emo Integrator are very useful integration processes to utilize on depressed feelings. The processes contains the No Intention Intention which helps unstick depressed feelings through fully experiencing them without trying to get rid of them or keep them. The gaining of these feelings intuitve messages aabout what to do are quite valuable. The integration of these feelings helps with the unsticking and the evaporation of the depression's absolutistic trances. Learning to integrate assists in long-term progress with depression. When someone takes up and habituates integration, depression has nowhere to stick. Teko |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression and mood elevators. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/22/02 03:13 AM) |
Hello,
The Emo-chi exercise can elevate mood and can help break that negative chant. The Electric Chair can also raise mood. Sometimes people forget what an up mood is. Carl Stohle |
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Unregistered(d) |
Emoclear & depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/22/02 09:30 AM) |
Hello Emoclearians:
I'm going to stress the importance of writing down your depression making beliefs. This brings them out in the air and tends to defuse them. Noting the absolutistic quality of them can begin to disempower them. Persons who are more oriented toward their inner belief systems and who suffer depression might get some real shifts with the Belief Whacker. The Belief Whacker was built to undo absolutistic thinking which is the mainstay of depression. Frank Grabowski TIPS FOR FINDING DISTORTED THINKING DISTORTED THINKING CHECK LIST Language and its meaning is highly important in creating our emotional reactions and sensations. Here is a checklist of words and phrases we use in absolutistic and upsetting evaluations: AWFULIZING: Here we make inconveniences or discomfort into disasters, catastrophes, something awful, horrible, or terrible. When awfulizing we fail to notice the positive or the neutral in our experience. Awful, horrible, and terrible generally imply 100% negative experiences. Very few experiences are fully awful. Believing a situation is awful will make it feel that way. Most so-called awful experiences could be made much worse. If you awfulize you could see your experience as "inconvenient", a "hassle", or "uncomfortable". "Difficult" & "tough" also work better. Typical awfulizing words: awful, horrible, terrible, disaster, holocaust, the worst, doom, total hell, catastrophe, the pits. To test your situation to see if it is really awful--ask the following questions: *Does feeling awful actually prove the situation is awful? *Does your belief create your feelings of awfulness or horribleness? *If you believed the event was inconvenient, would you feel differently? *Is there anything positive or neutral in your situation? A valuable learning experience? *How long will your situation last? Can you cope with it? *How is a disadvantage or inconvenience awful? *Could this situation be made much worse? *How does your difficulty compare with: (1) Being roasted slowly? (2) Dieing gradually and agonizingly from a rare disease? (3) Seeing loved ones paraded into slavery? (4) Being tortured slowly by aliens from another galaxy? *Is your situation truly awful or is it an inconvenience? CAN'T STAND IT-ITIS: Here we use evaluations like: "I can't stand it." "It's too much." "I can't take it." "It's driving me out of my mind." "It's overwhelming me." "When will this ever stop?" With these phrases we make uncomfortable and frustrating circumstances into unbearable ones. "Can't stand it-itis" resides at the core of impatience and frustration intolerance. If you're doing something that better be done and you feel extremely frustrated, you might think: "I can stand it." "It's not too much." "I can take it." "I can hang in there." "I've stood it before." "Much of life is challenging--I can put up with it." Typical can't stand it-itis phrases are: "I can't stand it." "I can't take it. " "This's driving me crazy." "I'm being overwhelmed." "When will this ever end?" "This's killing me." "I'm going out of control." "Life should be easy." See if you can really stand your situation by answering these questions: *Could you stand it? Have you stood it before? *Have you coped with a similar situation? *Could you stand it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *If your brain is healthy--can you really go crazy or would you just get upset? *Have you ever lived without it? *Where's the evidence that it's too much? *Can you stand it for a minute at a time? SHOULDING: Here we elevate desires and preferences into arbitrary and ironclad laws such as shoulds, musts, oughts, got to's, and deserves. Shoulding offers us little choice, creates pressures, and leads to anger, guilt, and shame. With shoulds we create new rules and play Jehovah with ourselves and others. If we are shoulding, we better use: "want", "prefer", "desire", "would strongly like", or "better do". Understand that everything is always as it SHOULD be. You may not enjoy the present, yet you better accept the idea that everything required to create current reality was done. The present SHOULD have occurred as it is now. It is unrealistic and playing GOD to believe that reality SHOULD not have happened the way it happened. Reality is as it exists. Every prerequisite was met. To demand "it" SHOULD not have taken place will upset you and buy you 2 problems for the price of 1. And by demanding "it" SHOULD not have occurred, you fail to accept what happened. If we don't like the present, we may alter it if possible and prevent what occurred from happening in the future. Reasonable "shoulds" refer to current reality and can be observed clearly by others. Unreasonable "shoulds" are based on the idea that things SHOULD occur because we demand they do. Not based on present observations, unreasonable shoulds are often grounded in the notion that what is correct for us is right for everyone. Example: Mensing's truths should work for everybody. Typical should phrases: "I should." "They must." "The world ought." "I've got to." "They have to." "They deserve." To test your "should" laws & rules--ask the following questions: *What law in the universe says you must or they should? *What evidence is there that you or they must or should? *Who or what creates this commandment? *Would a want or a preference give you or them more of a choice? *How would you talk a friend out of this must or should? *Where is it written that what you want, you must get? LABELING: Here we overgeneralize with the "verb to be" about ourselves, others, things, events, & the world. Example: "I'm no good." "I'm worthless." "I'm a failure." "They are slobs." "New York is a totally sick place." "Everything is no good." By overgeneralizing with "labeling" we, they, or it becomes one behavior, trait or quality. Example: I failed a geometry test--I'm a failure. Or they behaved badly--they are bad. Sometimes we might label the world, things, and events with an overgeneralized tag. Example: Philadelphia is a snake pit. Or my job is the pits. Obviously Philadelphia and jobs contain far more than negative qualities. If we label, it is better to choose labels that carry the notion that we and everything in this world are multi-faceted and contain many, many positive, neutral, and negative qualities. Recommended labels for the self: "I'm a multi-faceted person." "I'm a person with many positive, neutral, and some negative qualities." "I'm human with a wide range of qualities." These labels apply to others as well. Recommended labels for things, events, and the world: "It is multi-faceted." "It has many positive, neutral, and negative qualities." If you are labeling, ask yourself the following questions: *Do you have millions of traits & behaviors? *How can you just be one or a few traits & behaviors? *Can you choose not to rate yourself by a gross overgeneralization? *Is viewing yourself as just one or a few traits an overgeneralization? *List some of your many positive & neutral traits & behaviors. *Is it arbitrary to assign points to a trait or a behavior? How many points do you get added or subtracted for fallen arches? NEEDING NONNECESSITIES: Here we employ words like need, must have, got to have, require, and can't do without. Our desires and wants become elevated into needs and dire neccessities (water, food, oxygen etc.) for living and for happiness. Feelings of desperation and craving are set off by needing nonnecessities. Overcome this challenge by knowing you desire or want what you don't truly need. Better use words like: "want", "desire", "prefer", & "would strongly like." If you have been needing nonneccessities, ask yourself the following questions: *Would you die if you did not have it? *Is this truly necessary for survival or enjoyment? *Is this an important as food, oxygen, & protection from the elements? *Could you find pleasure doing something else or being with someone else? *Does your feelings of desperation or craving actually prove you need something or do they reflect your belief that you "need" something? *Is this something you need or something you want? *Can you accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving & caring manner? ABSOLUTIZING: With this challenge we employ words like always, never, all the time, forever, totally, continually, not ever, eternally, unceasingly, absolute, incessant, completely, entire, whole, and unrelenting. Absolutizing words mean 100% of the time with no exceptions. Often these words are linked to anger, depression, and impatience. Example: Victor is "never" on time. Or Sally "always" gets it wrong. If we are absolutizing we better use more accurate words like: "frequently", "infrequently", "sometimes", "often", "a good deal of the time", "every once in awhile", "intermittently", and "partially". These words lead to less upsetting emotional responses. If you are absolutizing, ask yourself the following questions: *Does this happen sometimes, frequently, or even infrequently? *What percentage of the time does this occur? *Is it really the entire situation or just a part or a percentage of it? *Does it ever stop? Has it ever stopped before? IMPOSSIBLE-IZING: Here we make difficult tasks into impossible tasks by using words like too difficult, too hard, impossible, unbelievably hard, too much, can't, and not a chance. Ask yourself if you could complete the task with the help of a support team, machines, or computers. Perhaps the task could be completed if you had new information. Further, could you complete the task if you just stuck with it or knew you would receive 2 million dollars or some other valuable reward? How would the task look to you if you broke it down into small manageable units rather that an overwhelming whole? Is it really impossible if you did it step by step? Remove "too" from difficult, hard, and much. Replace "can't" with can and will do. If you are impossible-izing, we better use words such as: "can", "possible", "possible with help", "difficult", "hard", "manageable", and "stong possibility". If you are impossible-izing, ask yourself the following questions: *Can you view the task in small manageable units and do it step by step? *Could you do it for 2 million dollars or some other valued reward? *Could you complete the task if your life depended on it? *Could you do the task if you had more information, a brain trust, computer support, large machinery, a team, or some other form of assistance? *Is it really impossible? *If you previously made mistakes, does it hold that you will always make the same mistake? *Was a previous failure just an unwanted result or learning experience on the way to your goal? DESERVINGNESS: With this challenge we believe we have a license from the universe that entitles us to get what we desire. Typical deservingness words are: deserve, special, merit, worthy of, right to, should have, mandate, or must get. Such thoughts fire up entitlement and anger. We may want or desire something, yet that does not prove we merit it. If you believe you deserve, better use words like: "want", "prefer", "desire", or "would strongly like to have". If you have the challenge of deservingness, ask yourself: *Where did you get the license? *Does the universe single you out as a special case? *Where is the proof that you deserve? *Are you ordained, exempted, or certified special? By whom or what? *What happens if the person you are dealing with also has a special license? *Who or what creates your deservingness? *Where is it written in the Bible that you are a special case? UNBELIEF: With this style of thinking we erase the reality of a situation. In unbelief we refuse to accept what happened as really what happened. Here we deny and create feelings of unreality and numbness. When we are practicing unbelief we use such words as: unreal, I can't believe it, unbelievable, this should not be happening, weird, wacky, incredible, implausable, and absurd. Better accept the reality of the situation and deal with the absolutistic thinking and imagery that may be occurring. Better use words like: "this is really happening", "real", "believable", "credible", "part of life", "this really should be happening". If you use unbelief, ask yourself the following questions: *Why should this not have happened? *Where is the evidence this is unbelievable? *If it happened, why must it not have happened? *What would two other observers tell you about what just took place? *If all the prerequisites were there, what is the evidence it should not have occurred? UNFAIR & UNJUST: Believing others act unfairly or unjustly toward you, is buying the notion that everyone shares the same vision of fairness or justice. Observe labor/management disputes. Both sides often believe their wants are fair and just, yet their visions are seldom in agreement. Demanding fairness or justice is another form of shoulding or deservingness. Typical unfair & unjust words are: unfair, unjust, isn't right, inequitable. If we are employing unfair & unjust, we better use words like: "prefer", "want", "desire", and "would strongly like". If you employ unfair & unjust thinking, ask yourself the following questions: *Does everyone share the same view of justice or fairness? *Is there a universal rule of justice that everyone recognizes? *Have you observed people or parties disagree over what's right, fair, or just? *Why must others hold your view? DIFFICULTY CREATING MINDSETS Most challenging negative emotions are created by upsetting beliefs and imagery. Some of these challenging styles of thought were listed in the "Distorted Thinking Check List". Cues that we are employing upsetting thoughts can be found in difficulty creating mindsets. Automatic & habitual, difficulty creating mindsets occur without reason or reflection. Here is a list of major problem creating mindsets: OVERGENERALIZING: Here several instances of a category are seen as an entire category. Overgeneralizing comes in two basic flavors. (1) An event happens and we conclude it will occur again & again. Example: I got fired, I'll always be fired. (2) You evaluate yourself, another person, or the world by one or a few traits. Example: I got rejected, I'm a reject. If you overgeneralize, focus on: (1) Frequency of occurence. This will give you a more realistic view. (2) That you recognize everything and every person possesses positive, neutral, and negative qualities. VIEWING ONLY THE NEGATIVE: This mindset has us seeing only the negative while filtering out the positive. Example: My wife did 7 really helpful things for me today, yet I only recall her failure to take a message when someone called. If you sometimes view only the negative, practice looking at what good or neutral things are happening in your life. You may want to make daily lists for several weeks to remind yourself of what is positive and neutral. BLACK & WHITE THINKING: Events are seen in black & white only with no neutral shades of gray. Or we see either/or situations, all or nothing, or one way or the other. These kinds of thinking signal we are not recognizing middle grounds, gray zones, average, or neutral areas. Most events don't occur in black or white or all-or-nothing terms without middle grounds. A black & white thinking example: If he's not a good guy, then he's a crook. Or if my performance wasn't great, then it stunk. If your thinking sometimes goes to blacks & whites, look at average, middle grounds, neutral, and gray areas. FAULT FINDING: Here we hunt for someone or something to blame. Example: If I didn't send Bobo to art school I'd be a millionaire. In fault finding we generally believe in one cause and one effect. Actually if we look at a situation from different perspectives we can find multiple causes and multiple effects. Fault finding is a serious waste of time that hampers finding solutions. Often when fault finding is applied to a person, we label that person and defocus from the behaviors that require change. The human brain is a wonderful device. It can come up with tons of causes, effects, and reasons after the fact. Fault finding, when applied to people, creates anger and guilt. It wastes energy better spent on solutions and changes in behavior. If you sometimes find fault, blame the entire universe for 2 seconds, then focus on what requires change. COMPARING: We build others up so we can compare ourselves to them and then put ourselves down. Or we build ourselves up and put them down. Example: Freddy owns a mansion and a yacht and all I have is a surfboard. I must be a loser. Comparing is another waste of energy. When we compare we are buying labels. Every person has positive, neutral, and negative aspects. If you tend to compare, then look at what is good or right with you or the other person. DOUBLE BINDING: A pressure cooker thinking style which occurs when you believe you must do something, but you can't. Example: I must complete this job, but it's impossible. Double binding commands us to do something, then tells us we can't. If you double bind, check out your commanding "shoulds" and see if a want or prefer works better. If you are impossible-izing, during your double bind, see if your situation is truly impossible. If your situation isn't impossible, then go with I can or I will. FOREVERING: We make the temporary into a permanent state. Example: I'll be depressed forever. Or I'll never get what I want. If we are forevering, we better look at the probability of change. Feelings especially change. LEAPING TO CONCLUSIONS: Here we base our conclusions on slim or no evidence. Trying to read someone's mind or making inferences based on little evidence are samples of this kind of thinking. Example: She loves me because she smiled at me. If you tend to jump to conclusions, better examine your evidence closely or make sure you have enough. NIXING THE POSITIVE: Here we explain away positive events. Example: I would not have passed the test unless I got lucky. Or winning the Nobel Prize was nothing much--I had terrific lab equipment. If you tend to nix the positive, practice accepting what good comes your way. Note how your efforts were involved in the positive outcome. GUT THINKING: Here you base your evidence on your surface feelings. Feelings can be as distorted as the beliefs, images, and thoughts creating them. Your feelings mirror your attitudes and if your attitudes are distorted, you can guarantee your evidence will also be distorted. Example: I feel in my bones this isn't going to be my year. Or I feel like I'm going to get assassinated if I go to next week's Shriner's meeting. If you tend to gut think, check out the beliefs & images behind your feelings. Look at the evidence. EXPANDING: Here we exaggerate small weaknessness or defects. Example: Making an error on the spelling bee was a disaster! Or my left nostril is slightly larger than the other--it destroys my face. If we expand, let us look at these deficiencies in the light of the larger context and accept what we can't change. Let us take into consideration what works and what is positive. CONTRACTING: Here we minimize assets or diminish the positive. Example: Winning the Super Bowl 3 years straight was nothing much. Or sure she's brainy, but she never uses it. If we contract the positive, let us accept what is positive and enjoy it. IRONCLAD LAWS: Here we make and buy laws for other people and events. Here are the shoulds, musts, & oughts. Example: He should know better. Or I must never make mistakes. These laws and rules are arbitrary, ironclad, and undercut choice. If you tend to create or use ironclad laws having no universal basis, then turn those laws into wants, desires, and preferences that give you more freedom of choice or more room to make learning mistakes. CULTURAL THINK: Here we blindly accept cultural and social roles & rules. Example: Women belong in the kitchen. Or you must always support the president no matter what. If you employ cultural think, then examine your values. PERFECTIONISM: We believe we can be perfect and live up to a superhuman standard. This thinking does not account for our innate tendency to make errors. Example: I should perform flawlessly and never make mistakes. If you tend toward perfectionism, recognize you are a fallible human who can only do his or her human best. You do not need to be perfect to accept yourself and treat yourself in a loving and caring manner. COMPLICATING: Here we believe complex explanations are innately superior to simple explanations. Such thinking may lead to convoluted, ineffective, and time consuming courses of action. Example: A therapy must address all the complexities of a person's history or the therapy lacks depth. Or a theory must be complicated in order to be valid. If you employ complicating, see if you can find a simpler, yet workable method of explanation. Know the bottom line is whether something works and holds up over time, rather than if its based on simple or complex thoughts. AN AUTHORITY OR LARGE NUMBERS SAY SO: Here something is held as fact because either an authority or large number say it's so. Example: The Book of Mooky says it's so-so it's got to be true. Or millions of folks the world over believe it's that way--it's got to be fact. If you have bought an authority or large numbers say it's so, then examine the authority and the group making the statement. Look for solid evidence. PERMANENT CONDITIONS: Taking a temporary or time limited situation and transforming it into a permanent condition. Examples: *I lost my job--I'll never work again. *She shot my proposal down--I'll never be married. PERSONALIZING: Taking personally random events and viewing them as attacks. Examples: *I must have been born under a bad sign because I fell down the subway steps. *If someone dies in a vehicular collision it's because of bad karma. DISEASE MAKING: Labeling a learned behavior a disesase. Example: *The Bunny Hop is caused by a genetic impairment. *Hiccups is a disease of the central nervous system which requires a 28 day stay. PSYCHOLOGIZING: Seeing psychological reasons for events. Examples: *I feel off the ladder today because I secretly wanted to harm myself. *I didn't enter the pie eating contest because I harbor a fear of failure. EGOCENTRISM: Thinking your the epicenter of universe and assuming you are also the epicenter of everyone else's. Examples: *People should automatically respect me. *Those idiots have no right to be standing in front of me. Make way! (c) Steve Mensing Have fun, Steve |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/23/02 12:36 AM) |
Hello all,
Although the Metaphor Runner isn't exactly a beginners process it would make an excellent method for handling vatious aspects of depression. Someone could intuitively create metaphors for- Inertia. Guilt. Overall negativity. Self-rating & self downing. Negative predicting. Related Personality Clusters. Poor sleep. You can add to the above list. These can be made into metaphoric targets for the Metaphor Runner and eithe cleared or integrated. Julian Kammerz |
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Unregistered(d) |
Depression. | ||
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Posts: 0 (05/23/02 08:48 AM) |
Hello:
The first line of offense in working with depression would be the Cardio Integrator, Emo Integrator, Emo Reviewer, White Door, Annihilator, The Action Manuever, Integration-Walking, and A Call to Action, the Electric Chair.. I would also add the Multi-Solutions Generator to uncover those depression-free times during the day. The answers you get from the Multi-Solutions Generator can help with problem solutions. The process itself would begin to chop away at depressed thinking because it shows where things are working or could work. Also there is good questions to break or change patterns. Persons are liable to come away from sessions with this self-counseling approach with a more optimistic framework from which to see their situation. Max Venhoven |
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